Once Upon a Dream

by Kelinswriter

Summary: Starts with the infamous OPT Pregnancy Test. Spins off from there into its own little universe.

Disclaimer: CBS, P&G, Telenext et. al. owns these characters; I'm just taking them off the shelf and playing with them for a while.

Thanks to: Skeeterbop for harassing me til I paid attention, and Fewthistle and her Bossy Muse for goading my own til she talked.

1.

If I didn't know better, I'd think you were pregnant.

The words had been said casually, almost flippantly - Natalia was only just getting to know Blake, but already she understood that Blake's most pointed observations usually sounded like an afterthought. It reminded her of Olivia, which might have had something to do with why she and Blake had fallen into such an instant friendship — only Blake tended to pause and think when one of her points hit home, while Olivia tended to just barrel through. Such a strange observation to be making, really, comparing her — girlfriend, soulmate, one true love? — to Blake Marler while peeing on a stick.

But Natalia had to do something to keep herself from going insane.

It couldn't be — she couldn't be pregnant. Not when she and Olivia were so close to moving forward. No more waiting, they'd told each other. Let's declare our independence and go to the barbeque together. The thought of it — unreal, the thought of it. To set all that fear behind and just choose to be together, no matter what Rafe or Frank or Father Ray or anyone else thought — was it really possible, that they could be doing this? That she could be doing this?

She set the test on the sink, then got up to wash her hands. She rubbed them dry on the towel, repeating the motion over and over until even the webbing between her fingers was completely dry. The towel slipped when she let it go, nearly falling to the floor. It's probably time for a clean one, she thought, automatically refolding the tan terrycloth into standard hotel formation. I know I just changed it this morning, but —

She sighed and let the towel drop unevenly onto the rack. Just start the timer.

She double-checked the information on the box, then set her phone for the appropriate number of minutes. Her stomach twisted, and for a moment she thought she was going to throw up again. But the feeling subsided, and she was able to slump back onto the closed lid of the toilet seat.

I just can't be pregnant. I can't.

-----------

"Natalia's been gone for a long time," Emma said.

Olivia scraped the butter she had been measuring into the mixing bowl, idly wondering just how much cholesterol was trapped in its congealed depths. That I must think about these things for the rest of my life is just unfair, she thought as she set the knife down. "Natalia's tummy is upset. She needs a couple minutes."

Emma's brows drew down, her mouth pursing in concern. "Maybe I should go check on her."

Olivia drew breath to say, "No, leave her be," but Emma got that look of pleading in her eyes, and Olivia realized there was no point in arguing. Probably time to check on her myself. Might as well let the Jellybean do reconnaisance.

"Okay, go see what's up," Olivia said, smiling as Emma scrambled through the door. The pattern of footsteps on the stairs was wrong, so she yelled "One at a time," at which point it shifted to the reassuring pound of eight year old feet hitting each step instead of every other one. What is it with that two at a time thing, she thought bemusedly as she washed her hands and headed upstairs.

Emma was standing outside the bathroom door, her little fist raised as if she was about to give the door a good pounding. Olivia caught her hand before it made contact with the wood, twirling Emma around in a pirouette. Emma giggled, craning her head back to look up at Olivia.

"Natalia?" Olivia called out softly. She rapped on the door with one knuckle, giving Emma a reassuring tug on her ponytail. "Sweetheart, are you all right?"

There was silence for a moment, and then Olivia heard a distracted, "Um, I'll be out in just a minute."

"Do you need some help?" Olivia asked, not liking the tone of Natalia's voice. There was something in it — a hint of — was that panic?

"No, I'm fine. There's nothing to worry about."

Olivia heard the lie in the words and reached for the doorknob. Wait, she heard. It was the voice of the new Olivia, the Olivia who was gentle and cautious and gave Natalia the space she needed. Don't barge in on her. Wait until she gets out, then talk to her.

"I'll just...I'll be downstairs in a minute, okay?" Natalia's voice was thick with the unmistakable sound of tears.

Fuck time and space, Olivia thought, shoving that patient, cautionary voice in the nearest mental closet and bolting the door. She crouched down in front of Emma so they were face to face and said, "Hey, can you do me a favor? Can you put the mixing bowl in the fridge and watch some TV for a little bit?"

"Are we still going to make the rice krispie treats?" Emma asked, her primary concern evident in her tone.

"I'm pretty sure we will, but I need to talk to Natalia about something first. Can you give us a few minutes?"

"Sure."

"Thank you, baby," Olivia said, planting a kiss on the tip of Emma's nose. Emma giggled and started downstairs, saying, "I know, one at a time" before Olivia could draw breath.

Olivia watched Emma plow down the steps and round the corner into the living room before turning to reach for the bathroom doorknob, hoping it wouldn't be locked. "Sweetheart, Emma's downstairs," she said as she turned the knob and pushed the door open. "Now what's going —"

Natalia was sitting atop the toilet lid, fully clothed, a home pregnancy test resting in front of her on the sink. Her eyes were wide and full of panic as they met Olivia's.

Olivia looked at Natalia, then at the debris of the pregnancy test — box, instructions, plastic wrapping — piled up in the sink. Then back at Natalia, who looked like a little girl, terrified she was about to get a spanking. Then back at the pregnancy test.

Olivia said, " Well, fuck."

----------

No, Natalia thought as the door was pushed inward. No no no no you can't. But by then it was too late; Olivia was through the door, and Natalia watched her take it in — the test and everything it meant — while horror washed through her. This was it, this was how it was going to end, and all because she'd been too afraid to face what she was feeling five months ago.

"Well, fuck," Olivia said.

Natalia closed her eyes, letting her head fall forward. She felt the tears start, hot and stinging as the shame flooding her mind and body. She wanted to curl up in a ball and die. Just like before, she thought. Only this time it's not my parents I failed, but Olivia. And somehow, that's so much worse.

"Hey," she heard, and felt a hand touch her head. Olivia crouched beside her, her hands falling onto Natalia's shoulders. Gentle fingers touched Natalia's face, brushing at the thick tears scalding her skin. "Hey, Natalia, look at me."

"I'm sorry," Natalia whispered. She felt a sob well up, tried but failed to swallow it. "I'm so — so —"

"Honey," Olivia said, her tone gentle, with just a hint of scolding. Natalia felt those strong arms wrap around her, and she slumped, burying her head against Olivia's shoulder while she cried. Olivia's hand stroked up her back, lifting to the top of her head, then stroking down her hair, the motion repeating over and over until Natalia felt herself begin to calm. She swiveled her head, her face turning inward so that it was pressed against Olivia's neck and chest. She felt Olivia brush at her hairline, tucking her hair behind her ear, her thumb lifting to stroke Natalia's cheek.

"Better?" Olivia asked, her cheek resting against the crown of Natalia's head.

Natalia nodded, sniffling. Her body seemed to settle, sinking into Olivia's, and a warmth trickled through her veins. She inhaled the scent of Olivia's skin — the faint citrus fragrance of the soap she used, the subtle, smoky scent of the perfume she dabbed against the notch of her throat each morning. Underneath it all was the clean, sweet tang of her perspiration, that odd mix of warmth and strength and life that Natalia associated with Olivia. She breathed it in again, wanting to pull that strength inside her. She hoped it would be enough to get her through the next moments, when she had to tell Olivia that she — that she was —

She lifted her head and, in a soft voice, said, "I think I'm pregnant."

"Yeah." Olivia tilted her head to the side so that she could look at Natalia. "I got that."

"I don't know how it — I was —" Natalia swallowed a hiccup. "It was so long ago, and —"

"Okay, okay, stop." Olivia shifted back, lifting herself so that she could sit on the edge of the bathtub. She took Natalia's hands between her own, twisting them so that back of Natalia's hands were resting in each of her palms. She stroked her thumbs up and down Natalia's wrists, and Natalia felt that warmth flood through her again. It was like a drug, that warmth, soothing her — and yet she felt restless too. She looked at Olivia's mouth and caught herself wondering what it would be like to kiss it, what it would taste like, if her lips would be as soft as they looked, if —

"Natalia," Olivia said, a hint of sharpness in her tone.

Natalia felt her attention shift, dragging her back into the present and the reality she didn't want to face. "I'm sorry," she repeated, her head dropping forward.

"I know, but that's really not the point," Olivia said. "The point, honey, is how you could possibly think that you're pregnant?"

"Well, because I — I got sick and —" She forced herself to meet Olivia's gaze. "Blake said..."

One of Olivia's eyebrows quirked upward. "Blake said?"

"Yeah. Blake said that if she didn't know better, she'd think that I was pregnant. And since it's possible, what with Frank and —"

Natalia saw Olivia's face grow guarded. "But I thought it was just the one time with Frank, at the end of February."

"Oh it was!" Natalia shifted her hands, catching Olivia's wrists and pulling her hands up so that they rested against Natalia's chest. "It was, I swear, just that one time, I made him wait before the wedding and then —" She willed everything she felt into her gaze. "Since then I haven't even thought about anyone but you. Not once."

Natalia saw something flicker in Olivia's pale green eyes — relief, followed by what might have been pride. Olivia's lips creased in a gentle smile, and she pulled one of Natalia's hands toward her, kissing the back of it. Clutching Natalia's fingers between her own, she said, "Okay, so, if you only slept with Frank the one time, that would make you five months pregnant."

"I know," Natalia said, her mind reeling at the possibility. She felt tears well in her eyes again.

"Hey, hey, none of that. Stay with me here." Olivia hunched forward, her eyes sparkling with — was that mirth? Did she really think this was funny? "So in that five months, have you had your period?"

"A few times, but..." Natalia sighed. "I don't think that can rule it out. I'm really erratic and I hardly bleed at all. That's why it took so long for me to figure out I was pregnant with Rafe all those years ago."

"Okay, first, it is just unfair that you apparently have the easiest periods on the planet. Second, if you're getting periods, then you're probably not pregnant."

"Yeah, but..." Natalia took a deep breath. "I've gained eight pounds. And I've felt sick for days, and —"

Olivia bit her lip, looking like she was trying to hold back a grin. "Um, Natalia, I've gained weight too. Six pounds."

"Really?" Natalia couldn't help but glance over Olivia's body. "I can't see it."

"That's because love makes you blind." Olivia smiled at her. "Honey, between all the baking we've been doing lately and the pasteles left over from Rafe's birthday, no wonder you've gained a few pounds. Plus, you're not burning off calories the way you used to when you worked three jobs."

"I know, but..." Natalia rubbed her forehead. Is it possible I'm not pregnant? "I keep feeling sick."

"And if you were pregnant, you'd be in your second trimester. For most women, the morning sickness stops somewhere in the fourth month." Olivia fixed her with her gaze. "What do you remember from Rafe?"

"I didn't —" Natalia thought back, a dawning awareness spreading through her. "Oh my God. I'm not pregnant."

Olivia shook her head, a laugh bubbling out of her. "No, you're really not pregnant."

"I'm not pregnant!" Natalia lunged at Olivia, wrapping her up in a hug so big that Olivia almost lost her balance. She yelped, bracing her hands against the sides of the tub to keep from falling in, and Natalia had to wrap her arms around Olivia's waist and hoist to get her back onto the edge of the tub. "Boy, now that you mention it, I can really feel those six pounds."

Olivia gasped. "Why, you..." she exclaimed, but she was laughing as she said it. She reached past Natalia, snagging the pregnancy test from the sink, and held it up so they both could see it. "See? There's 20 bucks you'll never see again."

Natalia snatched the stick out of Olivia's hand and tossed it into the garbage, letting out a relieved sigh. "I'm sorry, I just got so scared and — everything Blake was saying, it made me wonder if it was possible and then —"

Olivia shook her head. "Honey, I think Blake is great, but she is not someone to go to with pregnancy questions. I mean, this is a woman who thought she was pregnant with twins by different fathers."

Natalia stared at Olivia, waiting for the punchline. When none came, she blinked, and tried to wrap her brain around it, and blinked again. "Really?"

"Really." Olivia nodded. "I was friends with her mother Holly, so I know the whole story."

"No, but." Natalia felt her mind doing its best to compute how that could happen. She blinked again. "Really?"

"Just go with it," Olivia advised, tucking a tendril of hair behind Natalia's ear. "So, now that the pregnancy scare is behind you, we need to figure out why you're getting sick. And I think I know the answer."

"Yeah?" Natalia felt her eyelids flutter at the feel of Olivia's hand against her cheek. Her stomach lurched, not from nausea this time, but from that strange, warm feeling that ran through her whenever Olivia touched her. She took a breath and tried not to stare at Olivia's mouth. "Why's that?"

"Well in case you hadn't noticed, it's a sauna in here," Olivia said. "You need air conditioning, or at least some fans, to cool this house off."

"It's not that bad," Natalia said. "When Rafe and I lived in Chicago..."

"When you and Rafe lived in Chicago you were a single mom with barely any income," Olivia said. "Now you have a decent job — I mean it better be decent or I'm going to need to kick Blake's ass over more than getting you all freaked out over this non-existent pregnancy — and you can afford to do something about it. An air conditioner up here to clear the heat out. Some ceiling fans. Hell, I'll buy them for you because there is no way that I'm living —"

Olivia caught herself, her eyes dropping. She pulled back, just an inch, but enough for Natalia to feel the distance.

"You need better ventilation up here," Olivia said softly. "Fix that, and my guess is you'll start feeling better."

"Olivia," Natalia said, feeling something in her shatter at how much being patient was costing Olivia. She shifted forward, closing the distance between them. "I think maybe — it's time for —"

Olivia's head lifted, and Natalia could see the uncertainty swimming in those eyes. So vulnerable, she thought, feeling herself being pulled into those depths. So afraid. I'm so tired of seeing her afraid.

It was such a small amount of space, really, between her mouth and Olivia's. Natalia had thought it would be frightening to cross that traverse, but it was the simplest thing in the world when it came down to it. Just the slightest move forward and their lips were touching, their breath was mingling, their bodies were so close together. Not touching — not yet. But then Natalia's hand was threading through Olivia's hair and Olivia's fingertips were on Natalia's waist and Olivia's mouth was moving against hers, the touch so delicate that Natalia felt like she was going to melt. They pulled back by mutual consent, their foreheads pressed together, Olivia's soft exhales caressing Natalia's cheek.

"Not exactly where I expected that to happen," Olivia murmured.

"Me either." Natalia smiled and brushed a kiss against Olivia's cheek. "But then we never do what's expected, do we?"

"No." Olivia stroked her hand up and down Natalia's back, and Natalia had to fight back a shiver. "Come on, let's get back downstairs before Emma decides to hop the nearest bus."

"Oh, Emma!" Natalia exclaimed, guilt washing through her. "I abandoned our rice krispie treats."

"I had her put everything in the fridge when I came in here." Olivia grinned. "Besides, as hot as it is in this house, the marshmallows probably melted by themselves."

"Very funny!" Natalia exclaimed, getting to her feet. She tossed the pregnancy test packaging into the trash and washed her hands. "Just for that, I'm not letting you have any of my marshmallows."

Olivia leaned against the shower wall, a smirk creasing her face. She raised one eyebrow, her head cocked to one side.

"You —" Natalia sputtered, feeling herself turn several shades of scarlet.

"Did I say anything?" Olivia said, raising her hands.

"You're the picture of innocence," Natalia said as she opened the bathroom door. "Butter wouldn't melt in your mouth."

She thought she heard Olivia muttter, "No but something else would."

"What'd you say?" she exclaimed, turning on one heel.

"Me?" Olivia pushed herself to her feet, her eyes dancing. "I didn't say a thing."

Natalia narrowed her eyes at the older woman, then decided to let it go.

But when the butter was melting for the rice krispie treats, she couldn't stop blushing.

2.

"We forgot to buy salad," Natalia said.

Olivia shifted her gaze from her laptop to Natalia, who was standing by the stove with a perturbed look on her face. "I — was that on the list?"

"No, but I was supposed to get some." Natalia shrugged. "I guess I was a little distracted at the store."

"Must have been that miracle baby sucking your brain cells away, " Olivia couldn't help but say.

Natalia gave her a stern look, but Olivia could tell she was trying hard not to laugh. "Fine, fine, I'm a dope. But, see, I can think now...and so we need salad."

"Don't you have a few cans of green beans stashed somewhere?" Olivia asked as she logged off her email.

Natalia threw a glance over her shoulder, her eyes sparking. "Well yes, but I've tried getting you to eat green beans before, and it hasn't been pretty."

Olivia pushed her chair back, rising. She crossed the short distance between the table and the counter so that she could stand beside Natalia, who was putting together one of her homemade lasagnas. She had changed into jeans and a loose-fitting pink blouse a little while earlier, and Olivia couldn't help but notice how perfectly both fit her slender figure, eight extra pounds be damned. Olivia reached out her left hand, pressing it lightly to the small of Natalia's back, and felt the muscles jump against her hand. Aha, she thought, feeling a tingle run up her arm. The tingle spread, becoming a heat that suffused her whole body as she moved to stand directly behind Natalia.

"How many servings of vegetables have you had today?" Natalia asked, her voice soft and breathy. She reached for the package of parmesan at the far end of the counter.

Olivia grabbed the plastic bag first, her breasts brushing against Natalia's back as she stretched to reach it. She guided it to Natalia's hand, sliding her fingertips up the length of Natalia's forearm as she let go. "Do Rice Krispies count?"

"Rice —"

Natalia's voice faltered as Olivia stepped forward so that the length of her front was all but touching Natalia's back. Olivia let her left hand come around to rest on Natalia's waist, her right still stroking the smooth skin of Natalia's forearm. She tipped her chin against Natalia's shoulder, her head turned so that her exhales would trickle across Natalia's neck.

"Rice Krispies are made of rice. That's a vegetable, right?"

"Actually, it's a grain." Natalia shifted back, closing the fraction of distance between them, and Olivia's breath caught as their bodies sank together. Olivia wrapped her left arm around Natalia's waist, feeling Natalia take in a deep breath and let it go. She slid her right hand up to rest on Natalia's shoulder, turning her head fully into Natalia's neck and breathing her in.

"It's really unfair of you to do this when my hands are covered in lasagna and I'd have to move to wash them," Natalia said.

Olivia nuzzled her nose into Natalia's neck and began to sidestep them over to the sink. Natalia laughed, her head falling back against Olivia's shoulder, and Olivia brushed her cheek against the dark silk of Natalia's hair. When they made it to the sink, Olivia squeezed Natalia tight against her. For a moment, they both stood paralyzed, caught in the cocoon of their embrace. Finally, Natalia murmured, "Olivia, let me wash my hands."

"Why?" Olivia brushed a kiss against Natalia's neck, her body melting at the feel of that soft skin against her lips.

"Because if you don't..." Natalia hesitated, and Olivia felt her swallow, a tremble running through her. "If you don't, I'm going to get tomato sauce and parmesan cheese all over your shirt."

"Oh." Olivia grinned into Natalia's hair, relaxing her grip long enough that Natalia could lean forward and wash the lasagna ingredients from her hands. Olivia kept her hands loosely atop Natalia's abdomen, resisting the urge to slip one hand beneath the cotton of Natalia's untucked shirt. Too much too fast and you'll ruin it, she told herself. This time, savor every step.

Still, it seemed like a handwashing session worthy of someone with OCD. Olivia fought the urge to pull Natalia close again, her lungs tight from the strain of needing to have Natalia's body against hers. She'd felt desire before, but never like this; never so pure, unsullied by motives or calculation. She just needed Natalia, like she needed light and air. It was distinctly different, and yet on some level the same, as the way she needed Emma and Ava. She's mine now, Olivia realized. As much a part of me as my girls.

Natalia reached for the hand towel, wiping her hands, and set it down on the counter. She shifted, and Olivia loosened her arms, stepping back just enough that Natalia could swivel around to face her. Her hands fell to Natalia's back, pulling her close as Natalia's hands lifted to touch Olivia's face.

"I love you," Natalia whispered, something akin to wonder in her voice. "I never thought...how it could...but I do."

"So articulate," Olivia teased, pressing a kiss into Natalia's palm.

"Stop making fun of me," Natalia whispered, moving forward so that their hips were pressed together. She let one hand fall to Olivia's neck, her thumb brushing gently against Olivia's throat. She blinked, her eyes straying to the outside door. "You know, Emma could come bounding in here at any second."

Olivia nodded, unable to tear her eyes away from Natalia's face. "Then I suppose you'd better hurry up and kiss me."

"Me?" Natalia let loose a dimpled grin, her eyes sparkling. "I think it's your turn."

"I suppose that's..." Olivia leaned forward, so close that she could feel her own breath brush across Natalia's lips. "Only fair."

"I think —"

Olivia didn't let her finish, instead crossing the distance to press her lips against Natalia's in the briefest of touches. Olivia dragged her upper lip across Natalia's, caught Natalia's lower lip between her own, released. She shifted her head, changing the angle, and closed the distance again, her right hand sliding up to cradle the back of Natalia's head, to caress even as she guided Natalia toward where the next kiss would be. It continued for — Olivia didn't know for how long, somewhere along the way her internal clock just stopped working — but that didn't really matter, because Natalia's fingers were tangling in her hair and her other arm was wrapped around Olivia's back and their bodies were pressed together, not hard, not yet, but Olivia caught a glimpse of what that would be like and she wanted it, so badly —

— and yet their kisses remained gentle and sweet. Potent, yet innocent.

They pulled away slowly, their faces almost touching, arms and hands gently cradling still. Natalia cleared her throat, her lips nuzzling Olivia's cheek, and murmured, "Corn."

"Um." Olivia pulled back to look at Natalia's face, her eyes narrowing with worry. "Did I break you?"

Natalia laughed. "Sweet corn instead of salad. Mr. Williams down the road is selling it."

"You mean the big farm before the fork in the road that had that horrible smell a few months ago?"

"Yes, well, that horrible smell means sweet corn now. So go get some while I get the lasagna in the oven, and then we'll have dinner."

Olivia unleashed her best pout. "You know, I really would eat my green beans."

"Sure you would." Natalia smiled and lifted up on tiptoe to press a kiss to Olivia's forehead. She took a step back, one hand sliding down to rest loosely on Olivia's hip. "Hurry up. I think his stand closes at six."

"Okay." Olivia took a step back, her head spinning. "I'll see if Emma wants to...or she might...I'll find her and figure out..."

Natalia just smiled, her eyes dancing, and Olivia groped for her purse, almost knocking her cell phone off the counter. She tucked it into her pocket and said, "I'll be back in a little bit."

"I'll be here," Natalia said, still smiling.

"Just stop," Olivia muttered. Natalia's laughter followed her as she stumbled outside, blinking like a newborn in the bright summer sunlight.

Corn, she thought as she set off in search of Emma. If my exes could see me now.

-------


Olivia and Emma were unloading the bags of sweet corn from the trunk of Olivia's car a half hour later when a familiar figure emerged from the woods surrounding the house. Olivia squinted, apprehension churning in her stomach when she recognized the lean, dark haired young man striding across the field.

"Rafe!" Emma dropped her bag of corn back into the trunk and took off toward Natalia's son. He was wearing a white t-shirt and gray cargo pants, and as he drew closer, Olivia realized that there was a beer bottle in his hand. Great, she thought as Emma reached him. Just what we need.

Emma took Rafe's hand, pulling him toward the car while talking a mile a minute. "And then we're going to have corn and lasagna, and we made Rice Krispie treats for tomorrow. Are you going to be there tomorrow? There's going to be sparklers. Do you like sparklers?"

"Sparklers are all right," Rafe said as he and Emma drew to a halt. He looked up, his brown eyes narrowing, and said, "Olivia."

The way he enunciated every syllable, as if bathing each one in its own dripping contempt, made Olivia want to smack the kid. Instead, she stood up straighter, rebalancing the bag of corn in her arms. "Nice to see you, Rafe."

"Yeah," Rafe drawled, and Olivia could hear the telltale slur in his voice. Had he had three? Four? Natalia would be furious.

Still, she tried to make the best of it. He was here, and that was something. "We're having dinner in just a little while if you would like to join us."

"We're having movie night." Emma tugged on Rafe's hand. "We were going to watch Sleeping Beauty , but if that's too girly, we can watch something different."

"Nothing but girls around here now, is there?" Rafe took a swig off his beer and aimed a sneer in Olivia's direction. "Though I suppose the new man of the house doesn't mind."

Olivia narrowed her eyes at Rafe, daring him to utter another syllable, and said, "Emma, why don't you go inside."

Emma looked at Rafe, then back at Olivia, her brow creasing in concern. "Mommy?"

"It's okay, baby." Olivia brushed the back of Emma's head, urging her around the car. "I'll be inside in a few minutes."

Emma nodded. Glancing back at Rafe one last time, she started toward the farmhouse.

Olivia waited until her daughter was out of earshot before saying, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I'm here to see my ma," Rafe said. He took another swig of his beer, his fingers tightening on the bottle. "I wanted to see if I could talk some sense into her. But as usual, you're here, so I'm screwed, right?"

"You want to talk to your mother, fine, talk to her. But sober up first." Olivia took a breath, trying to rein her temper in. "Rafe, you know how upset she'd be to know that you were walking around drunk. Not getting in trouble is one of the conditions of your parole."

"Trouble?" Rafe made a broad gesture with the bottle, beer foaming out of the top. "Why the fuck would I get in trouble? I mean, who would blame me for getting drunk when I just found out that my mom is a dyke and that she's sleazing around with the biggest slut in town?"

Olivia's jaw clenched, rage bubbling up inside her. Don't, she told herself, struggling to contain the white-hot bolt of fury surging through her veins. Don't do it. He's not worth it, and Natalia would never forgive you.

"Rafe," she said, willing every scrap of kindness she could muster into her voice. "I know you're upset, but this isn't the way to handle it. Why don't you come inside, and we can sit down and have something to eat and talk about this."

"Talk?" Rafe grabbed at the bag in Olivia's hands, tearing the brown paper open so that the ears of corn spilled like bowling pins onto the driveway. "I don't want to talk to you. I don't want anything to do with you. You've wrecked everything!"

It's time to get away from this, Olivia realized as she backed up a step. Rafe was escalating quickly, she could see it in his eyes, and the only way to shut it down short of clocking him was to remove herself from his presence. I don't want Natalia to see you like this, she thought, willing him to back down. Just get out of here and sleep it off.

"I never liked you," Rafe said, taking another swig of beer. "You used my dad, and after he was gone, you were a bitch to my ma. I hated the way she bowed and scraped and took care of you, all because of Gus's heart. The heart you stole. You didn't deserve it."

"You're right," Olivia said, her voice low and quiet. "That's the first truthful thing you've said this entire conversation, Rafe. I didn't deserve it."

"Then why are you here?" Rafe shouted, spreading his arms out wide. He pressed forward, stepping into Olivia's space until their faces where only a few inches apart. "You know you don't deserve it, then you shouldn't be here. You should be someplace a person like you belongs. Not here! Not with my ma!"

"She wants me here," Olivia said softly. "Rafe, don't you see? We love each other."

"Love her?" Rafe put a hand to his head, staring at her in disbelief. "How the hell — who — you don't know what love is. All you do is take! You took my dad's heart, and now you want to take my mom. What's she got that you want, anyway? Is it the farm? You took her last house, you want to take this one too?"

"I didn't —" Olivia felt a flush of humiliation wash through her as she remembered the moment when she had tried to leverage Gus's house away from Natalia in exchange for cash. She'd thought that she could buy her off then, buy Gus away from her, like his memory was a commodity that could be bought or sold. Such a fool, she thought. How the hell did you ever forgive me?

She took a breath, clinging to the memory of how she'd changed in the last year. She wasn't that person any more, so bitter and jaded and convinced that everything in life had a pricetag. Natalia had taught her differently.

"I'm not going to argue with you about this, Rafe," Olivia said. "Why don't you come sit down on the porch, and I'll get you some water, and you can talk to your mom."

"No!" Rafe shouted, leering forward until his face was once again only inches from Olivia's. "I don't want any frickin' water. I want you to leave here, and never come back. You got me? Never come back!"

Olivia could smell the beer on his breath, and she felt the taste of fear, cold and metallic, creep against her tongue. Was this what it was like in those moments before he shot Jeffrey? she wondered. Was this the same rage he was feeling?

She took a step back, but Rafe followed, unwilling to leave her personal space. "I should beat you down like the bitch you are, you know that?" He lifted a hand, his fist clenching. "Someone messes with you, messes with your life, you beat them down."

That's it, Olivia thought, as the rage uncoiled. She lunged forward, pushing him back on his heels, feeling the heat blaze off her as she snapped, "That's how you handle everything, isn't it? You don't like what someone's saying about your dad? You shoot him. You don't like someone in your mother's life? You threaten to beat her up. Are you such a weak, pathetic excuse for a human being that you can't think of a better way to handle your problems? Did your mother really raise such a jackass?"

"You —" Rafe smashed the beer bottle against the side of Olivia's car, and she recoiled, feeling real fear as the green glass shattered. He clutched the top of the bottle in his hand, the jagged glass edge glinting like emeralds in the evening shadows. "You think you can talk to me like that? Nobody talks to me like that. You —"

Olivia heard the farmhouse door slam. Natalia shouted, "Rafael Rivera!"

Olivia took a step back from Rafe, hearing broken glass crunch beneath her feet. A few seconds later, Natalia reached her side, brandishing the broom she used to sweep the porch. She thrust it forward, the handle digging into Rafe's chest.

"How dare you," Natalia spat, her brown eyes hard with fury. "How dare you come here, like this, and threaten a member of my family?"

"Ma, she's not a member of anyone's family," Rafe protested, dropping his hand to his side. "She's just some bitch who's using you."

Natalia stepped forward and, in one swift motion, slapped Rafe across the face. "If you think so little of me, then you don't know me at all. You don't understand anything about the home we've created here." She gestured back at the farmhouse, her eyes never leaving Rafe's face. "This is a home built on love, Rafe. Love. And you come here, drunk on cheap beer and stuffed up with macho pride, and think you can threaten that? Threaten the woman I love?"

"Ma, I —" Rafe put up a placating hand. His eyes were still wide with shock, his face red where Natalia's hand had connected with his cheek. "I just —"

"Shut up!" Natalia tapped the handle of the broom against his chest. "Drop the bottle and walk away, Rafe. Go back to Frank's and sober up. I swear, if I find out that you went anywhere else tonight, I will call your parole officer and get you sent back to jail myself."

Rafe's face went pale, all the bravado draining out of it. "No, Ma. You can't do that."

"I can and I will." Natalia stared Rafe down for a moment longer, her body quivering from the tension. "I said go!"

Rafe backed up a few steps. He turned his head, his eyes finding Olivia's, and pointed at her, the menace in his dark eyes clear. Then he was moving across the field, back in the direction he came. Olivia stood beside Natalia, the two of them watching silently until Rafe disappeared into the trees.

Natalia clutched at Olivia's arm, her other hand still clenched tightly around the broom handle. Her eyes were wide with concern. "Are you all right?"

Olivia nodded, struggling to find her voice. "He wasn't going to hurt me." I don't think, hung silently between them, but she was sure as hell not going to say that out loud. "He just wanted to scare me."

"Rafe never means to hurt anyone." Natalia looked down at the mix of corn and broken glass surrounding the back of Olivia's car. "We need to get this cleaned up before Emma comes out here." She crouched down, fishing an ear of corn out of the mess. "This was good corn, too."

"There's more in the trunk," Olivia said, putting a hand on Natalia's shoulder. "Natalia, let's go inside, make sure Emma's okay. We can take care of this later."

"No, but I just...we shouldn't..." Olivia felt Natalia tremble beneath her hand. "How could he — how could my little boy do that?"

Olivia smoothed her hand over Natalia's shoulder, tugging on her shirt. "Come on, sweetheart. Let's go inside."

Natalia nodded, rising mechanically to her feet and walking alongside Olivia toward the house. They made it about ten steps before Natalia clutched at Olivia's arm and jerked to a halt. "I'm sorry," she said, turning Olivia to face her. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Olivia wrapped her arms around Natalia's trembling form, feeling Natalia sag against her. She stroked a hand from the top of Natalia's head to her back, then up again, the movement deliberate and soothing. "It's okay," she whispered. "It's okay, honey."

"No it's not," Natalia choked out as she shivered in Olivia's arms. "I can't — I didn't — how could Gus's son —" She struggled for breath. "I'm going to lose him, Olivia."

"Shhh," Olivia soothed, pressing a kiss to Natalia's cheek. "We'll figure it out."

"I don't know how to deal with him any more," Natalia said. "Maybe — maybe I have to accept that jail is where he belongs."

"No," Olivia said swiftly, her heart shattering at the despair in Natalia's voice. She pulled back from their embrace, tucking a hand under Natalia's chin and gently forcing Natalia to meet her eyes. "Listen to me. We are going to find a way to get through to him, okay? This is a bad patch, but we will work it out."

Natalia gazed at her for a long moment, disbelief flickering in her eyes. Finally, she nodded, her hand lifting to grasp Olivia's wrist. She pressed Olivia's palm to her cheek, holding it there for an instant. Olivia stepped forward, bringing her other hand to Natalia's face.

"We'll work it out," Natalia said, sounding like she was trying to convince herself.

"We will." Olivia pulled Natalia close, wrapping her arms around Natalia's back and holding on tight. "I promise you. I won't let you lose your son."

3.

"Is it just me, or does Maleficent look a lot like Alex Spaulding?"

Olivia's words jarred Natalia out of her contemplation of the fireplace grate. She turned back toward Olivia, who was sitting on the far side of the couch, Emma's head resting atop her lap. The little girl, exhausted from her day at camp and the baking and an hour spent chasing around the yard, had fallen asleep shortly after they'd started the movie, and for the last half-hour, her feet had been resting in Natalia's lap. It was the kind of domestic contentment that Natalia had been dreaming of for months, and yet she could barely process it. Rafe is completely out of control, she thought for the thousandth time. Holy Mary, Mother of God, help me figure out what to do.

"I'm sorry," Natalia said, shifting her attention back toward Olivia. Emma twitched at the movement, and Natalia caught her left foot between her hands to avoid being kicked in the stomach. "What did...what about Alex Spaulding?"

Olivia pointed at the TV. "The voice. The hairline. Plus I'm pretty sure she turns into a dragon when provoked. I know I've seen her eyes go yellow."

Natalia gave a weak smile, shrugging. "I guess."

Olivia looked at her for a long moment, her head tipping to one side. She slid a hand under Emma's head, holding her steady while she tucked a pillow beneath her, then climbed to her feet. Holding out her hand, she said, "Come on."

Natalia looked up at Olivia in confusion. "Where are we going?"

"Outside." Olivia cocked her head over her shoulder. "Get some fresh air."

"But Emma —" Natalia pointed at the TV. "The scary part of the movie's coming up. If she wakes up and we're not here..."

"She's seen this thing so many times, even the fifty foot tall Aunt Alex doesn't scare her any more." Olivia grabbed the remote, squinting at it for a minute while muttering "Definitely glasses" under her breath. "There. The movie's on repeat so it'll just start over again. If she wakes up, all she has to do is look outside and she'll see us."

Natalia considered arguing further, but Olivia held her hand out, wiggling her fingers. She looked down at Natalia, a mix of worry and affection in her eyes. "Please?"

Natalia nodded and carefully lifted Emma's feet off her lap, settling her legs back onto the cushion. Emma immediately stretched, her face scrunching as she flopped onto her stomach and burrowed into the pillow. Natalia couldn't help the smile that creased her face, a lump forming in her throat as she reached for the tan and red-striped blanket resting atop the back of the couch. Olivia's hands touched the cloth at the same moment, their fingertips brushing together as they moved in concert to spread the blanket over Emma's sleeping form. Olivia brushed a kiss against Emma's temple, then rose, her eyes gliding over Natalia like a caress as she snagged Natalia's hand and led her onto the porch.

Though it was nearly eight p.m., sunset was just starting, the partly cloudy sky turning pink and yellow with the sun's reflected rays. The trees surrounding the farm were in shadow, their lush green turned blue and purple with the approach of night. Wordlessly, they walked toward the treeline, Natalia making a conscious effort not to look at the driveway. The mess Rafe had made had been cleaned up before dinner, but to Natalia, his actions still marked the area. It wasn't just the dent in the side panel of Olivia's car, which Olivia had assured her didn't matter in the least. It was the hatred in his behavior, and what they had brought out in her, that made her ashamed to look in that direction.

She looked, instead, at the trees, and the grass, and the sunset. Anywhere but at Olivia.

They walked in silence for several moments, holding hands. They were rounding the far corner of the property when Olivia said, "You know, before I knew Ava was my daughter, I did some terrible things to her. Things that should have landed me in jail for a long time."

Natalia cast a glance in Olivia's direction, startled more by the tone of Olivia's words than by what she was saying. With the exception of the occasional unguarded aside, Olivia rarely spoke about her past. Certainly not in this way.

Olivia tugged on Natalia's hand, guiding her forward. She looked toward the trees, the last rays of sunlight glinting on her angular cheekbones. Her green eyes were hidden by shadows. "The years after Emma was born were so frightening. First Phillip kidnapped her, and then —" She hesitated. "There were other attempts. Alan was doing everything he could to destroy me. And just when it seemed like things had settled down, that maybe we were okay, something happened. Ava was babysitting Emma, and Emma got into something she shouldn't have, and she got very sick. I thought Ava had done it deliberately to get back at me for something I did when there was a fire at the Beacon. So I —" She closed her eyes, swallowing hard. "I lost it. I went crazy for a while, and Ava almost got hurt, twice. Then I tried to scare her into leaving town, only the man I hired —" Her breath hitched, and tears glinted in the last fragments of sunlight dappling her face. "He took it too far. He would have – hurt her — maybe even killed her if she hadn't managed to get away. And I have to live with that. For the rest of my life, I have to live with the fact that I almost got my baby girl killed."

"But you didn't —" Natalia pivoted to face Olivia, clasping both her hands. "You didn't mean to."

Olivia looked down at her, something dark and haunted in her eyes. "I will never know. Not really. If I hadn't learned that she was mine, I don't know that I would have thought twice about what I put her through — about what he almost —" Her voice broke, and she took a slow breath, regrouping as she pulled back from some dark place, some elusive terror that Natalia could not quite identify. "It didn't matter, you see. Nothing mattered, because I thought she was trying to hurt Emma."

Natalia looked up at Olivia, trying to fathom the complexities, the mysteries in the woman she'd fallen in love with. "Why are you telling me this now?"

"Because you need to know." Olivia lifted a hand to caress Natalia's cheek, her smile gentle and so filled with pain. "Kids grow up, they become adults. They have their own agendas and their own ideas. And sometimes — sometimes to protect what you think is right, what you believe with all your heart and soul is worth protecting, you end up on opposite sides. You do things you think you'd never do."

"I've never hit Rafe before." Each word was like a stone pressing down upon Natalia's heart. You slapped Rafe. You deliberately raised a hand to your little boy.

"You stood up for me." Olivia took a step forward, both her hands framing Natalia's face. "You stood up for Emma. I know that doesn't make it any easier, but you can't torture yourself."

"How?" Natalia asked, her eyes searching Olivia's face for answers. "How do I forgive myself for doing something so terrible?"

"You keep loving him." Olivia leaned forward, pressing their foreheads together. "You keep fighting for it, every day. And when you do, sometimes a miracle happens."

"You're telling me you believe in miracles now?" Natalia asked, feeling a tear trickling down her face. She sniffled as Olivia's thumb slid over her cheek, brushing the moisture away.

"I believe that there is no way Ava should love me or want me to be in her life," Olivia said, her breath warm on Natalia's face. "But there she is, fighting for me, caring about me. And if Ava can get over the way I hurt her, then Rafe can get over you knocking some sense into him."

"It's not that easy," Natalia said. "He's a m—"

She froze, the tumblers clicking into place. Oh.

Olivia pulled back, her hand tucking under Natalia's chin. She waited until Natalia looked at her before saying, "He finally became a man to you today. His own person, making his own choices."

"Yes," Natalia said, as the tears began in earnest. "And I don't like his choices. I don't understand how he could hate us so much that he would...he would..."

She couldn't get any more words out; they caught in her throat, sticking hard, a sharp pain flaring through her chest. Olivia pulled her close, holding her tight while she cried, letting her get it out of her system once and for all. "I'm sorry," Natalia whimpered when it was all done, feeling like a fool. "All I've done today is cry."

"It's those damn prenatal hormones," Olivia murmured.

"Shut up."

Olivia laughed, pressing a soft kiss to Natalia's temple. "You okay to walk now?"

"Yeah," Natalia said, pulling her face away from Olivia's shoulder. She smoothed a hand over the damp cotton of Olivia's patterned shirt. "I got your top all wet."

"You can cry on my shoulder any time." Olivia hooked an arm around Natalia's neck, pulling her close, and Natalia encircled Olivia's waist, turning into her body as they walked back to the porch. Olivia guided them up to the bench, shifting in Natalia's embrace so that they were facing each other. "Why don't you sit down. I'm going to go check on Emma and get us something to drink."

Natalia nodded, too spent to protest. Olivia nuzzled her forehead, and then she broke away, slipping into the house. With a sigh, Natalia settled on the bench, staring up at the last sliver of orange fading from the summer sky. She wondered if Rafe was looking up at the same slice of horizon. She'd called Frank, warned him that Rafe had been drinking and that he needed to stay in. I'm sure it's fine, Frank had insisted. Rafe's a good kid. It had been a challenge to not tell Frank where he could stick his 'good kid' spiel, but she had managed to stay calm. No point in upsetting the only person who might, maybe, be able to handle Rafe right now. Besides Olivia, that is.

Olivia returned a few moments later, two wine glasses in hand. They were filled with red wine, which Natalia avoided unless it was spaghetti night at Towers. "You'll like it," Olivia said as she sat down next to Natalia and handed her a glass. "This is a very good Chianti from the Beacon wine cellars, and many Italian peasants labored long and hard so that we could enjoy it."

"See, now I'm just going to feel guilty about all those people who worked their fingers to the bone so I could sit here and drink," Natalia said as she stared at the ruby red liquid.

"It was five years ago. They're over it by now, I'm sure." Olivia lifted her glass, touching it lightly against Natalia's, and said, "To new beginnings."

"New beginnings," Natalia murmured, raising the glass to her lips. She took a small sip, recoiling at first from the bitter taste. After a moment, she felt the taste change, the bitterness fade. She squinted, trying to reconcile the contrast on of flavors on her tongue. "Cherries?"

Olivia nodded. "And what else?"

Natalia lifted her glass, taking another sip. "Grapes."

Olivia chuckled. She tucked one finger beneath the bottom of Natalia's glass, pushing it upward. "Breathe it in."

Natalia felt her lips draw down in a confused frown. "Huh?"

"Breathe it in." Olivia lifted her own glass to her nose, inhaling. "The bouquet is half the experience with a good wine." She swirled the wine in her glass and inhaled again. "Go on."

Feeling uncertain, Natalia lifted her own glass, swirling it like Olivia had done before pressing it to her nose. She breathed in the scent of the wine, her mind analyzing its different elements. She could smell the grapes now, ripening on the vine, and the cherries, rich and red as they hung from the tree, and something else — something antique and mysterious. "It smells like wood."

"Aged in the finest oak barrels, of course. Now take a sip, see what else you find."

Natalia did as suggested, only this time she tried to let go of any expectations for what she might taste. Closing her eyes, she let the wine wash across her tongue, disregarding the initial bite, breaking down each of the flavors: the oak, the grapes, the cherries. She noted something else — the flavor binding all the elements together. A sense memory came back to her: her mother in their tiny kitchen, steaming the rice for arroz con pollo , dashing sofrito into the pot while Natalia cut carrots and shelled peas. She allowed herself a moment, to remember, to mourn, and then she was back. She slid closer to Olivia, whispering, "Spice."

"Impressive." Olivia lifted one arm, allowing Natalia to curl into her side. "Next time we visit Ava, we'll head up to Napa and you can conquer every tasting room in Wine Country."

"You just want to get me drunk," Natalia said, letting her head fall into the crook of Olivia's shoulder.

"That'd be fun too." Olivia pressed a kiss to the crown of Natalia's head, and for a few moments, they sat quietly, sipping their wine while they watched the first stars begin to pierce the indigo sky. A melody began to float on the air, coming from the TV inside, and Olivia hummed along. "I love this."

"It's my favorite part of the movie," Natalia said. "When they're dancing, and the fairy godmothers keep changing her dress from blue to pink and back again."

"The music is actually from the Tchaikovsky ballet. I saw it once, on San Cristobel, when I was young. It made me want to be a princess." Natalia heard a hint of regret creep into Olivia's tone. "I wanted so many things."

"Olivia?" Natalia said, shifting so that she could look at Olivia's face. It was there again; that same shadow that had been on it when she had talked about her mistakes with Ava. There was so much pain there; Natalia didn't understand it, but more than anything, she wanted to take it away. She lifted a hand to Olivia's face, tracing the line of her jaw, and whispered, "Please," speaking to that part of Olivia that she knew was hidden from her still; the part of Olivia that was afraid, and ashamed, and desperately in need of forgiveness. It was the part of her that was terrified to let Natalia see her; the part of her that was still afraid that one day, Natalia would simply disappear.

Olivia let her uncertain green gaze rest on Natalia, and Natalia sensed that an internal debate of seismic proportions was in progress behind Olivia's eyes. She blinked, and Natalia saw the decision made, felt the walls slam back into place. "Not tonight."

Natalia looked at Olivia for a long moment, debating whether to push. There will be time for that later, she told herself. She waited in silence while the pain in Olivia's eyes retreated, the sparkle returned. Olivia leaned to the side, putting her wine glass on the ground, and turned to face Natalia. Holding her hands out, she said, "Natalia Rivera, would you dance with me?"

Natalia felt a quiver of uncertainty. A memory flashed through her: Nicky Aitoro standing in front of her, her back to the wall of the St. Columbanus gym, Roxette telling her to listen to her heart. "I don't...really..."

"It's easy." Olivia took the wine glass from Natalia's hand and set it beside her own, rising to her feet. "Just follow me."

"So you're leading?"

Olivia pressed her lips to Natalia's ear and whispered, "If you'll let me."

Natalia felt a flash of heat wash through her as Olivia drew them out into the yard. Olivia pressed one hand to the small of Natalia's back, the other clasping their free hands together, and Natalia let herself be guided back and forth in time with the melody Olivia was humming. Their steps got bigger as they got more comfortable, their bodies gliding seamlessly in a three-step rhythm across the grass. Olivia pulled back, twirling Natalia in a circle, once, twice, laughing as she pulled her close, and suddenly they weren't dancing any more, they were holding each other, and the heat inside Natalia became a fire. She closed her eyes, feeling the shock of Olivia's body molded against hers, the breath going in and out of her lungs, the heart beating in her chest. Olivia's mouth pressed lightly against her own, and Natalia reacted on instinct, her fingers threading through Olivia's hair as her lips parted under Olivia's touch. Olivia let out a soft gasp, a shudder going through her body, and then Olivia's mouth was opening against Natalia's, Olivia's tongue was touching hers, and there was no hiding, there was only the night, and the stars, and them.

There was a crackle in the distance as they broke apart; kids letting off firecrackers. A bottle rocket streaked across the sky, breaking apart and raining tiny sparks of light across the horizon. Olivia whispered, "See? We need a warning label."

Natalia pressed her face into the crook of Olivia's neck, her body aching. She breathed in, her arms tightening around Olivia's back. "Stay."

Olivia stiffened against her. Natalia heard a soft noise escape from the back of Olivia's throat, and then Olivia breathed out, her hand lifting to cradle the back of Natalia's head. "No."

Natalia frowned, pressing a hand into Olivia's chest until she could step back. She looked into Olivia's eyes, finding them by their reflection of the lights from the house. "Emma's already asleep. Your old room's all ready. Stay."

"You've had a rough day." Olivia pressed her hand into Natalia's cheek, something akin to that old pain flickering in her eyes. "I've had a rough day. Tomorrow's going to be crazy. What we all need is a good night's sleep."

"So sleep here," Natalia said, locking her arms around Olivia's back.

"If I stay here." Olivia drew in a breath, dropping her head forward. Her nose brushed over Natalia's cheek. "If I stay here, I won't be in the guest room, and we won't be sleeping."

Oh, Natalia mouthed, feeling a tremble roll through her.

"Oh," Olivia whispered, her mouth creasing in an affectionate, knowing smile. She let her hand slide down to the small of Natalia's back, swaying slightly, and added, "I want to stay, so much. But I want the first time we're together to be about us. And I don't know, with everything that's happened, that that can be the case tonight."

Natalia sighed. "Plus...Emma."

"Emma." Olivia pressed a kiss to Natalia's temple. "What do you say tomorrow morning, you come over, and we tell her."

"And then we could ride to the barbeque together?" Natalia suggested.

Olivia grinned. "If you want to be my designated driver, sure. We show up and let all of Springfield take a good look at the hottest couple in town."

"Well half of it's hot."

"What are you..." Olivia's eyes widened. "Was that an insult to me or a putdown to you?"

"Like I'm hot," Natalia scoffed.

"You are so..." Olivia hand drifted down to rest against Natalia's backside. She gave a little squeeze, and Natalia couldn't help but yelp. "So very hot."

"And you're evil," Natalia said, trying not to press her body into Olivia's. It was getting harder to resist the impulse, especially with Olivia's hand resting where it was. Just the slightest pressure, and they'd be locked together, their bodies moving in tandem, and —

"Okay," Olivia breathed. "I stop putting my hand there. I go home, take a cold shower, we get some sleep, and tomorrow, Emma and the barbeque, in that order."

"And tomorrow night? After the fireworks?" Natalia asked, biting the inside of her lip.

"Wash off the bug spray, put Emma to bed, make a list of all the guys we don't have to worry about hitting on us any more." Olivia grinned at her. "Anything else?"

"Yeah." Natalia took a deep breath and murmured, "You stay here, at the farmhouse, in my bed. And we don't sleep."

Olivia froze, staring down at Natalia for a long moment. She tipped her head to the side and whispered, "You're sure?"

"I'm sure," Natalia murmured, more than a little surprised to realize that it was true. She was sure; more sure than she had been about anything in a very long time.

"Okay, then." Olivia's face tipped downward, and Natalia tilted her chin, her lips finding Olivia's. Their kiss was slow this time, but as full of passion as the last, and when they broke from it they were both panting.

"I don't want to wait for anything any more." Natalia lifted her hands to frame both sides of Olivia's face, a feeling of wonder flowing through her. She kissed Olivia again, then once more, before pulling back to look at her as she whispered, "Tomorrow is our day of new beginnings."

4.

Olivia woke the next morning to Emma bouncing on the bed, shouting, "Mommy! Wake up! The picnic!"

"Mmmmph." Olivia forced one eye open, peeling her face off the pillow. Her face felt wet, was that — Great, drool. How attractive. I better not do that tomorrow morning, when I'm waking up next to —

She smiled.

Rolling onto her back, she pulled a pillow out from beneath her and propped it against the headboard so that she could sit up. She opened her arms and said, "Come here, my bouncy little Jellybean."

Emma giggled and flopped into her arms, the force of her weight nearly knocking the breath out of Olivia's lungs. "Hey, take it easy on your poor mother. I'm not as young as I used to be."

"You're —" Emma squinted. "Forty-two, right?"

"Uh huh," Olivia said.

"And Natalia is..." Emma looked confused. "Mom, how old is Natalia?"

"Not nearly as old as I am." Olivia relented when she saw the look of incomprehension on Emma's face. "She's thirty-six."

Emma pondered again. "So you were six years old when Natalia was born."

"About that." Olivia peered down at Emma. "What's with the math test, Bean?"

"Well I was just watching TV and they were showing pictures of George Washington and Ben Franklin and all these other people in funny clothes, and talking about how it's been two hundred thirty-three years since they signed the Decoration of Independence and —"

"Declaration." Olivia chuckled when Emma scrunched her brows. "It's like when you stand up and say what you believe, and you don't care who hears it."

"So it's like shouting?"

"Kind of." Olivia tickled Emma's tummy. "But what does that have to do with how old Natalia and I are?"

"Well they were saying that the day the Decor — Decloration of Independence was signed is America's birthday, and that it's two hundred thirty-three years old. So I was trying to figure out if there's anybody I know who still remembers it."

Olivia narrowed her eyes at Emma. "So you were checking to see if your mommy is the oldest person on the planet?"

Emma looked embarrassed. "I guess those people are all dead now. Unless, there's like, vampires or wizards who are that old somewhere."

"Well there is your Grandpa Alan," Olivia muttered under her breath.

"What did you —"

"Nothing, baby," Olivia said, her lips twisting in a smirk. "What do you want for breakfast?"

"Aren't we going to eat at the picnic?"

"We are, but that won't be for a few hours yet and you need a good breakfast to start your day. So what'll it be?"

"Um." Emma thought for a minute. "Pancakes."

"You want bananas in them today as a special treat?"

Emma shook her head. "The people in the kitchen don't make them right."

Olivia gave her a sympathetic look. "Not like Natalia's, huh?"

"Nope." Emma's blue eyes went wide, confusion and longing on her face as she said, "Mommy, are we ever going to move back to the farmhouse?"

"I don't —" Olivia felt butterflies jump in her stomach. Don't get her hopes up. "I don't know what will happen, baby. But I do know that we're going to stay over at the farmhouse tonight."

"We are?" Emma exclaimed, her face lighting up.

"Yes, we are," Olivia grinned, letting out a grunt as Emma squeezed the breath from her lungs again. "Hey, Em, need those ribs."

"Sorry, Mommy." Emma disentangled herself from Olivia's embrace. "I'm gonna go pack my bag."

"Okay, well you just —" But Emma had already scampered out of the room. "Need one of those wildlife tags on her, I swear."

She snagged the hotel phone from beside the bed and called down to the kitchen, resisting the urge to place an order for valium with their pancakes, bacon, and fruit. The butterflies in her stomach were having some sort of divebombing competition, leaving her full of hope in one instant, ready to despair at the next. Would Emma accept the news about her relationship with Natalia better than Rafe did? Would they be able to get through the picnic without the kind of hurtful comments that would upset Natalia or Emma?

Would Natalia ever arrive?

Olivia's cell phone rang as she was stepping out of the shower. Natalia, said the display, and once again, Olivia told herself that she needed to give her beloved her own particular ringtone. The problem was what to pick; lately, every song she heard on the radio reminded her of Natalia. Even that damn "Boom Boom Pow" song, because Natalia in a pair of Fergie's skin tight leather pants —

"Knock it off, Spencer," Olivia muttered under her breath as she brought the phone to her ear. "Good morning."

"Good morning," Natalia said in a sing-song voice. "Did you get a good night's sleep?"

"I did," Olivia said, proud of the fact that she was telling the truth. She had expected she would be too wired to sleep, but the reality was that she was out the moment her head hit the pillow, without the need for a nightcap or a Tylenol PM. Just hanging out with Natalia was exhausting, it seemed — in the best way possible.

"I slept well too," Natalia said. "And I got up early this morning and baked some chocolate chip cookies to bring to the picnic, so between that and Emma's Rice Krispie treats, we should be all set."

"Sounds like it." Olivia opened her closet door, searching through her clothes. "No morning sickness?"

"You —" Olivia could all but see Natalia rolling those big brown eyes. "Never gonna let me live that down, are you."

"Pretty much no," Olivia said, hearing the affectionate teasing creep into her tone. "But you wouldn't want me any other way."

"No, I wouldn't." Natalia paused, then said, "Wear the jeans."

"How did..." Olivia pulled the phone away and glared at it. Putting it back to her ear, she asked, "How did you know I was picking out clothes?"

"I heard the clothes hangers scraping on the rail." Natalia's voice dropped low. "You know which jeans I mean, right?"

"The black ones?" Olivia fingered the pair in question, her face flushing as she remembered how they had held each other as they had talked, for the first time, about sex being a part of their future. And then Rafe had to ruin it, the cynical part of her couldn't help but point out, but she mentally bitchslapped that aspect of herself, focusing on the memory of Natalia's palm pressed to her lips.

"I like the way you..." Natalia hesitated. "The way you look in them."

"Why Natalia Rivera." Olivia grinned. "Have you been staring at my ass?"

"Busted," Natalia said with a giggle. "I can't help it, you look good in those jeans. You look good in everything."

"So do you," Olivia said, hearing her voice drop into that soft, low range that meant she was speaking the truths of her heart. "I could spend all my time just looking at you and I'd be happy."

She heard Natalia take a breath. "Me — um. Me too."

"How soon will you be here?" Olivia asked as she sorted through her collection of casual shirts, trying to figure out which one would look best with the black jeans.

There was a rap on the door. "Better get that," Natalia said.

Olivia opened the door, expecting to see room service with their breakfast. Instead, there stood Natalia, clad in a v-necked turquoise t-shirt, ice-white jeans, and a pair of open toed-sandals. Olivia saw a blush spill across Natalia's cheeks when she realized that Olivia was still in her long magenta robe. "Uh, hi...I can..."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous." Olivia ushered her inside, leaning in for a furtive kiss that made Natalia redden even further. "Let me make myself presentable and then we'll figure out what to say to Emma."

She ducked back into the closet, snagging the first shirt she found — gray, short-sleeved, sufficiently low cut — and her jeans and diving into the bathroom to put them on. She had her robe half-off when she realized she'd forgotten certain essentials, and she couldn't help but grin when she saw Natalia go scarlet when she fished a pair of red silk panties and a bra out of her underwear drawer. "I've got red, Emma's wearing white, and you've got blue," Olivia said before ducking back into the bathroom. "All in the holiday spirit, right?"

Natalia mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like, "As long as no one gets to see your red but me," and then Olivia heard another rap on the door. This time it was room service, and when Olivia emerged, dressed and with a light sheen of makeup on, Natalia had finished setting out the food for her and Emma and was pouring herself a cup of coffee from the carafe Olivia had ordered. Olivia noted that her own coffee was already poured and clearly doctored just the way she liked it. Walking over to Natalia, she kissed her cheek and whispered, "You spoil me."

"You'll make it up to me later," Natalia said, and blushed again at her words. "Um. I didn't mean it like that."

"I know you didn't," Olivia said with a soft laugh, caressing Natalia's face. "Are you okay with this?"

"Yes." Natalia let out a nervous sigh. "I just — I don't want her to be upset. I mean I know that Emma loves having me in her life, but it's one thing for me to be her second mommy and it's another for me to be her —" She hesitated. "I don't even know the word."

"Her parent in every way," Olivia said, taking Natalia's hand. "And the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with."

Natalia looked at her, and Olivia felt that odd weightless feeling that seemed run through her every time their eyes met. A conversation of sorts passed between them — I'm scared — Me too — It'll be okay — I know — and then Natalia smiled, her dimples sneaking out as she sat down at the table. "So what are we going to say to Emma?"

"About what?" Emma asked as she bounced into the room. She rushed up to Natalia, and gave her a hug. "Did you know Mommy is six years older than you are?"

Olivia burst into laughter at the Where the hell did that come from look on Natalia's face.

"Yes," Natalia said, her lips quirking in that way that meant that mischief was coming. "I am aware that your Mommy is ancient compared to me. She can barely keep up with me most days."

"I would like to point out that someone dam— arn near needed oxygen after our hike at the spa," Olivia said with some asperity. "And that someone was not me."

"Well, you know, it was allergy season," Natalia said, looking sheepish. "Besides, since then I started going to the gym."

"Yeah, to look for me."

Natalia swiped a piece of bacon off Olivia's plate. "Well then I guess I should eat something so I can keep my strength up."

"Hey." Olivia pointed toward the phone. "You need breakfast?"

"I had some toast and eggs at home." Natalia stood up long enough to help Emma scoot her chair into place, then sat back down. "I needed something simple."

"Your stomach still upset?" Olivia asked as she poured syrup over her pancakes.

"A little, but I think that's just...because." Natalia slid her eyes toward Emma and shrugged. "I found a couple fans in the attic, so I put those out and it helped air out the upstairs. In fact, that's where I was yesterday when you got back from getting the corn." The light seemed to leave her face.

"Anything?" Olivia asked, her voice gentle.

Natalia shook her head. "But we're going to have a great day today, right, Emma? The two of us, we're going to dominate that three-legged race, aren't we?"

Emma nodded, chewing hard on a mouth full of pancakes. She swallowed, cleared her throat, and said, "So what did you want to tell me?"

"Um." Olivia felt her stomach drop at the question. That damn kid's hearing is way too good. "Well, it's something that maybe should wait until we finish eating."

"Is it bad?" Emma asked, apprehension filling her face.

"No, honey, it's not bad." Natalia glanced at Olivia and added, "I think it's really good."

Olivia smiled, the love she felt for Natalia flooding through her once again. Please let me never forget how lucky I am to have found her, she thought as their eyes met. She forced herself to turn her attention back to Emma, who was waiting expectantly. Olivia noticed that her eyes kept straying back and forth between them, as if she knew that the news she was about to be given involved both adults. I don't know if that's good or bad. Please, let it be good.

Olivia took a sip of coffee to wash away the syrup clogging her throat. She set her cup down and leaned forward, focusing all her attention on Emma. "Baby, do you know what it means when two people are dating?"

"Yeah." Emma set down the strawberry she'd been nibbling on. "It means that they go to movies and dinner and stuff, and they hold hands, and sometimes they kiss."

"That's right." Olivia kept her attention focused on Emma, although she desperately wanted to glance at Natalia for reassurance. She took a moment to find her next words, knowing they needed to be right. "And you know what it means to fall in love, right?"

"Like Prince Philip fell in love with Sleeping Beauty. He came and rescued her. Only —" Emma frowned. "Except for that one time they talked in the forest, they never really dated."

"Well, in fairy tales, sometimes people don't really date." Natalia let out a soft laugh, and Olivia dared a glance at her. Natalia smiled, tilting her head slightly as if to say, You're doing good. Keep going.

"When two people have been dating for a while, and they love each other, sometimes they start spending more time together. They might sleep over at the other person's house, and sleep in the same bed. And sometimes they —"

"Have sex?" Emma piped up.

Olivia heard the distinct sound of Natalia choking on her coffee. She reached over and snagged the cup with one hand, smacking Natalia between the shoulder blades with the other. "You all right?"

Natalia coughed, her face blood red. "I'm fine. I'm good." Natalia smirked, her eyes watering, and murmured, "She gets that from you."

Olivia rolled her eyes, turning her attention back to Emma. "Baby, where'd you hear about that?"

"Keira told me about it," Emma said. "Remember, my friend at the spa? She said she had to have a different room than her mommy and daddy so that they could have sex on their vacation."

"And what else did Keira tell you about sex?" Olivia asked, wondering just how much bad karma one earned by wishing one could sew together the lips of an overly-talkative child.

"Not much, except that sometimes her parents yell a lot when they're doing it. So I asked Jane about it."

"You —" Olivia felt the glass of water hovering in front of her. She took it from Natalia, slammed it down, and thought about going for the vodka. Setting the glass on the table, she said, "What exactly did Jane tell you, Jellybean?"

"That I shouldn't ask about it again until I was old enough to drive." Emma looked perplexed. "But I overheard her telling her boyfriend that it was a lot of fun."

"Her boyfriend?"

"Yeah, you know. Scott, who works down in the kitchen."

"Used to," Olivia muttered under her breath.

"Olivia." Natalia looked at her, trying not to grin. Later, she mouthed, then turned her attention to Emma. "Sounds like this sex thing is still kind of mysterious, huh?"

"It's a grownups thing," Emma said. "It sounds a little weird."

"It — can be," Olivia stuttered. "It's —" Not the way this was supposed to go, she thought, taking a deep breath as she tried to steady her frazzled nerves. "They — um —"

"Sex is something that two people do when they love each other," Natalia said, smoothly stepping into Olivia's meltdown. "It's a way to make the person you love feel how much you care about them, by touching and holding them."

"Keira said —" Emma cast down her eyes, chewing on her lower lip. "Keira said sometimes it means people sleep without wearing any pajamas."

"Yeah, it —" Olivia swallowed hard, resolving to just barrel through. Emma deserved honest answers to her questions, even if it seemed like it was too early for her to be asking them. "Most of the time, when people have sex, they don't wear clothes."

"So they're naked?" Emma took a moment to digest this information. "It still sounds kind of weird."

"It's okay to think it's weird," Natalia said, smiling when Emma looked up at her. "When I was a little girl, it sounded really weird to me too. But when I grew up, and I met Rafe's daddy, I found out that it wasn't weird, because I loved him and he loved me." She looked over at Olivia, her face full of certainty as she said, "When two grownups love each other, it's one way for them to share that love. And it's a very beautiful thing."

Olivia smiled back at Natalia, all her doubts quelled by the unwavering devotion in Natalia's eyes. We can get Emma through this, she thought as she reached beneath the table to clasp Natalia's hand. But when I catch up with Jane, they're going to need the cast of all three CSI shows to identify her.

Emma was staring down at her food, wearing that look on her face that meant she was putting things together in her little blender of a brain. "So does this mean that you and Natalia are dating?"

"I — uh —" Dammit. Olivia glanced at Natalia, whose face registered her shock at the words, then back at Emma. "Did someone tell you that, Emma?"

"No. It's just —" Emma looked back and forth between them. "You spend time together, and you hug each other, and you hold hands..."

Olivia felt Natalia's hand jerk in hers under the table. She threaded their fingers together, needing the contact.

"And last night, I saw you kissing in the front yard."

"Busted," Natalia muttered under her breath.

Olivia felt her face flush with heat. "Saw that, did ya?"

Emma nodded. "I saw you dancing, and then you kissed. It was a really long kiss. A lot longer than any kisses you ever gave Buzz, Mommy."

Natalia made a strangled noise that might have been a high-pitched giggle. Olivia resisted the urge to smack her forehead, thinking, At least she didn't bring up Frank. "Yes, Em. Natalia and I were kissing." She drew Natalia's hand upward, still clasped in hers, and rested them together on the table. "Natalia and I are in love."

Emma smiled. "I'm glad you're in love, because you're happy when you're in love, Mommy. And Natalia's happy too."

"I am, Emma." Natalia looked over at Olivia, tears shimmering in her eyes. "Your mom makes me so happy."

"It's a little different," Olivia said, turning her gaze back to Emma. "Some people don't understand, when both of the people who are dating are women. Like how some people got upset when you did your 'My Two Mommies' presentation at school last year."

"Derek's mom said I couldn't play with him any more," Emma said with a pout.

"I know, baby. And some people might be mean to your about it, or say nasty things about me and Natalia to you." Olivia hesitated. "I hope they won't, but it could happen. And if it does, I want you to talk to me or Natalia about it because we need to know. We want to help you with that, and we want to help other people understand that our family isn't any less special than theirs is just because it doesn't have a mommy and a daddy."

"We're unique," Emma said with a grin.

"Yes we are." Olivia glanced over at Natalia, seeking one last reassurance. She got it in the tearful nod Natalia gave her and the gentle stroke of her thumb against Olivia's wrist. "So one of the reasons we needed to talk to you about this today is because from now on, when we stay at the farmhouse, you'll sleep in your bedroom like always, but I — I'll be sleeping in Natalia's room, with Natalia."

"Does this mean that we'll be sleeping at the farmhouse a lot?" Emma asked.

Olivia drew breath to say "I don't know," but before she could, Natalia spoke up. "Yes, you'll be sleeping over at the farmhouse a lot. I like waking up with both my girls, and making banana pancakes for them, and feeding the ducks, and taking walks..."

"And kissing Mommy," Emma said with a giggle.

"Yes," Natalia said, and it took all of Olivia's strength to survive the look of love and devotion and — was that lust? — shining in her eyes. "And kissing your Mommy."

Olivia looked back at Emma, who had turned her attention back to her pancakes. "So, Em, you sure you're okay with all this? It's a lot, I know."

"I am," Emma said, forking up a chunk of pancake and holding it so that the syrup drizzled over her plate. "It makes me happy to have two mommies all the time."

"It makes us happy too," Olivia said. "And if you have questions, you can ask us anything you want, okay?"

"Okay." Emma took a bite of pancake and reached for her juice.

Olivia sank back in her chair, exhausted. Natalia squeezed her hand, mouthing You did it at her. Olivia shook her head, mouthing back, We did it.

With a last squeeze, she disentangled her hand from Natalia's, reaching for her fork.

Emma finished off the last of her bacon and said, "Mommy, where do babies come from?"

5.

They arrived at the picnic around one. There were only a few cars parked in front of the Bauer house; Natalia recognized Blake's Taurus and Frank's SUV, parked perilously close to a fire hydrant. "Someone should give him a ticket for that."

"I'm sure he just wasn't paying attention," Olivia said as she unbuckled her seatbelt.

"That's not an excuse," Natalia said as she shut the car down.

Olivia grinned, her eyes dancing. "Not exactly in a good Frank mood, are we?"

"Let's just say I need to have a talk with my son's mentor," Natalia said, tossing air quotes around the final word. "I recognized that brand of beer."

Olivia jerked her head toward the back seat with a look that said, We'll talk more about this when little ears are far away. She turned in her seat and said, "Ready to go, Em?"

Emma gave them an adorably crooked grin. "All ready!"

"Okay, let's go!" Olivia winked at Natalia and got out of the car. She opened the back door for Emma, who was scooting across the seat with the pan of Rice Krispie treats in tow. "How about I get those out for you," Olivia said as Emma backed onto the sidewalk. She lifted the pan out of the car, holding it out for Emma, who was bouncing up and down with excitement. "Put your hands under it, baby," Olivia said as Emma reached for the glass pan. "Under it. There you go."

"Can I take them inside?" Emma asked as she cradled the pan in her arms.

"Sure. Just be careful because you can't see where your big feet are landing right now."

"Okay!" Emma scampered across the yard toward the door of the Bauer house in a blur of red and white stripes.

"Slow down!" Natalia called out as she rounded the car to stand beside Olivia. Emma hesitated for a half step, then went back to moving as fast as her gangly legs could carry her.

"My baby is so happy." Olivia put her arm around Natalia's shoulders. "She's off to cure world hunger, one Rice Krispie treat at a time."

"She was giving me a history lesson while you were finishing getting ready," Natalia said. "About George Washington and Paul Revere and Betsy Ross. She asked me if I knew anyone who had been in the Revolutionary War."

"Yeah, her concept of time is still a little shaky." Olivia laughed. "She had me thinking I needed a better moisturizer this morning when she started asking if I'd been around back then."

Natalia bit her lip, trying to hold back a grin as she said, "Honestly, you don't look a day over one hundred to me."

"Very funny." Olivia bumped their heads together. "You okay?"

"Yeah." Natalia hooked an arm around Olivia's waist. "Actually, it was really good for me to talk to Emma this morning. I told her about my great-great-grandfather who fought to free Puerto Rico from Spain in the Spanish-American War. It reminded me of when I told Rafe those stories when he was a little boy, and how proud he was that his ancestors were soldiers."

"He's got a mother he should be proud of too," Olivia said. "I've heard she's a freakin' superhero."

Natalia laughed and tucked her head into Olivia's shoulder, wrapping her other arm around Olivia's waist. "I don't know what he thinks of me these days." She sighed. "Oh, by the way, I had to explain that I was an American to Emma, even though my family comes from an island in the Caribbean. She was a little confused about that."

Natalia felt Olivia stiffen against her. "Yeah." A pained look crossed Olivia's face. "Um."

"What?" Natalia asked.

"You, um..." Olivia blinked. "Well you know how I'm from San Cristobel?"

"Yes, you've mentioned this." Natalia smiled, squinting up at her. "I hear it's beautiful."

"It is," Olivia said, though that same strange shadow flickered in her eyes. It fled quickly, to be replaced by something that looked like embarrassment. "And you know that I never...well...changed citizenship."

Natalia looked up at Olivia, her jaw dropping. "You're not an American?"

"Technically..." Olivia sighed. "It was never an issue when there was always a new one to marry."

"But..." Natalia gestured around. "You've been here a long time. You could apply for citizenship."

"I know, I just..." Olivia shrugged. "The last time the US government noticed me I almost ended up back on a beach. I've been a little afraid to stir things up."

Natalia felt laughter rising in her. She tried to hold it back, but it wouldn't subside.

"What?" Olivia asked, exasperation creeping into her tone.

"Just that —" Natalia struggled to catch her breath. "Of all the people I could have dated in my life, I never thought I'd have to worry about the INS showing up at the house because of a white girl."

"Funny." Olivia spun Natalia into her arms so they were facing each other. "She thinks she's so damn funny."

"I am funny," Natalia said with one last laugh. "I'm hilarious."

"You're adorable," Olivia said, brushing her nose against Natalia's.

"You —" Natalia leaned back, poking one finger into Olivia's chest and giving her a determined glare. "Next week, we start cramming for the test."

"What, you don't want to move to Iowa with me?"

"No thank you." Natalia lifted her hands to frame Olivia's face. "I like our life as it is, right here."

"Me too," Olivia said, tipping her face downward.

Their mouths connected in a slow, gentle kiss that deepened the longer it went on. Natalia felt Olivia's hands guide her around so that her back was angled against the car, her body pressing into Natalia's. Heat flooded through Natalia as she ran her hands down Olivia's back, her hands finding the back pockets of Olivia's jeans. I shouldn't be doing this, she thought, even as her fingertips were sliding down inside them, anchoring her as she pulled Olivia closer and —

She heard a cough. A startled, distinctly male cough.

Natalia broke from the kiss, peering over Olivia's shoulder. Her gaze was met by four pairs of blue eyes; three shocked, one amused. The latter pair belonged to Phillip Spaulding, who was standing a few feet away, Beth, Lizzie, and Bill Lewis alongside him. Bill's mouth, Natalia couldn't help but notice, was hanging open.

Phillip said, "So I guess you told Emma?"

"Oh, God," Olivia muttered, her arms tightening protectively around Natalia. She turned to look at Phillip, a mixture of amusement and irritation in her voice as she said, "Yes, we talked to Emma."

"Good," Phillip said, a wry smile creasing his face. "She inside?"

"Uh huh." Olivia pulled Natalia back up onto the curb, holding her steady while she found her footing. "Do me a favor, okay? Tell her the Rice Krispie treats she made are your favorite dessert."

"Of course. I can't wait to try them." Phillip waved a hand toward the rest of his family. "Bill, Lizzie, don't you need to get back there to get set up for the kids' games?"

"Uh...uh....yeah." Lizzie's eyebrows were raised almost to her hairline. She glanced at Bill, frowned, and grabbed his hand. "Come on, Bill. We need to test out those nice cold water balloons on you."

"Yeah, that'd be —" Bill shifted his gaze from Olivia to Natalia, then back again. "Probably a good idea."

Lizzie dragged him forward in a determined march toward the house. He stuck his hand behind him as they walked past, and Olivia smacked it in a low five.

Beth cleared her throat. "Olivia, Natalia, lovely to see you both." An amused smile played across her features as she followed her daughter and future son-in-law toward the Bauer house.

Phillip took a step to follow her, then turned and said, "Olivia, I thought we talked about waiting until Rick was around before doing this kind of thing."

"There's more where that came from," Olivia said with a mischievious grin. She glanced at Natalia, her eyes sparkling, then waved a hand at Phillip. "Move along, you. Nothing to see here."

"I bet that's not what Bill would say." Phillip's eyes met Natalia's, and he gave her an understanding smile. "Just be happy," he said, before turning to follow his family around the side of the Bauer house.

"Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed," Natalia muttered, burying her face in Olivia's chest. She could feel the heat radiating off her face.

"Hey, I'm not the one who went looking for loose change." Olivia unleashed a throaty laugh, her lips brushing the crown of Natalia's head. "Not that I'm complaining."

"Of course not." Natalia lifted her head to look at Olivia, unable to resist the mirth etched into her girlfriend's face. "I guess we started telling the neighbors."

"That's one way of putting it." Olivia stroked a hand up and down Natalia's back. "How are you feeling about that?"

Natalia looked into Olivia's eyes, seeing all the certainty she needed within them. She jammed her hands into Olivia's back pockets and said, "Bring on the next batch."

__________

They walked into the backyard of the Bauer house, hands clasped together. The crowd was still sparse, Olivia noted as she glanced from the pool area to the tree-lined expanse of yard beyond. Mindy Lewis was chatting with Beth and Lillian by the food table, and Emma had found some little friends to play with, presumably Bauer cousins. Blake was by the grill with Frank and Rick, looking irritated. She whirled on Phillip, who had walked up behind her, and thrust out her hand. He looked taken aback for a moment, then pulled out his wallet and started laying bills across her palm. The second he was finished, Blake shot a glare Rick's direction, then began stomping toward them.

"Now there's someone I need to have a talk with," Olivia said.

"Be nice," Natalia warned, squeezing her hand. "Remember, she's my boss now."

"I'll be gentle as a lamb." Olivia waited for Blake to come within earshot before crooking a finger in the redhead's direction. "Blake! Come talk to me."

"I have to get hamburger buns. And hamburgers. And hot dogs, and pretty much every other damn thing we're going to need if we actually want to eat today." Blake jerked to a stop in front of them, running her distracted gaze over their clasped hands. "Hi. You guys look happy."

"We are happy," Natalia said.

"And she's not pregnant," Olivia added, jerking a thumb in Natalia's direction.

"You're not?" Blake raised her eyebrows. "Well, that's good I guess. I mean, that would have been really awkward, wouldn't it?"

"A little." Olivia narrowed her eyes at the shorter woman. "Where exactly did that come from, anyway?"

"I don't know, I just..." Blake shrugged. "What do I know, I was never any good when it came to that kind of thing." She reached out, giving Natalia's arm a squeeze. "I really have to go before Rick thinks of more things he didn't bother to buy. I'll see you later. Glad you're okay!"

Before either of them could utter a response she was headed around the side of the house.

"I'm difficult to work for?" Olivia asked, cocking an eyebrow at Natalia.

Natalia laughed. "I probably should go help her."

"Nuh uh." Olivia laced their fingers together. "You're not going anywhere. Not when I can have you on my arm for the whole world to see."

"Well, don't you two look lovely," said a familiar voice.

Olivia turned, smiling as she saw Josh Lewis coming toward her, wearing a red and white striped polo shirt and tan shorts. "You look like you just wandered out of your third grade picture," she teased.

"I guess I've never lost my boyish charm," he replied, giving her a dimpled grin. His smile shifted to something a little less rakkish as he turned his gaze on Natalia. "Hello."

"Hi, Josh." Natalia threw Olivia a nervous glance. Suddenly, her eyes widened. "We forgot the chocolate chip cookies."

Olivia grinned at her. "I guess we were a little...distracted."

Natalia blushed, disentangling her hand from Olivia's grip. "I should go get them. I'll be right back."

Natalia cast a glance over her shoulder as she left, and Olivia wrinkled her nose at her, thinking, I'll give you that one for the sake of the cookies. But you don't get to sneak away so easily next time. Her eyes wandered over Natalia's form, her mind traveling to what it would be like that night at the farmhouse, when she got Natalia out of those perfectly fitting jeans and —

"Earth to Olivia," Josh said.

"Huh?" Olivia turned back to him. "Don't you have a crisis to babysit somewhere?"

"Reva has given me the day off." Josh gave her a puzzled look. "Where were you?"

"I was..." Olivia thought about telling him, then decided to wait until she could illustrate in more concrete terms just where her mind had wandered. After all, she couldn't deny Josh Lewis the thrill of realizing that one of his exes was now into girls. "I was thinking about baking."

"Baking." Josh's blue eyes sparkled. "Now that's something I never thought I'd hear coming from you."

"Times change." Olivia tucked her hands in her pockets. "What were you trying to tell me?"

"I wanted you to know that..." Josh jerked his head, urging Olivia to follow as he backed up a few steps. When they were under the shade of a large tree, he lowered his mouth close to her ear. "It's extremely likely that Edmund Winslow is still alive."

"What?" Olivia's head snapped up, adrenaline surging through her veins. "But I saw him by the river, that day with Reva."

"That wasn't Edmund," Josh said. "Right before he left town, Jeffrey and I figured out that the dead man was a look-alike, probably sent by Edmund to cause trouble."

Olivia's mind dredged up a decade-old memory of a palace guard who thought he could out-blackmail Edmund. Just another jerk who trusted the son of a bitch and wound up dead, she thought as she rubbed her forehead. It's a miracle that I'm not on that list too. "You know, it's just like Edmund to do that. Have some guy made up to look like him, then send him to get killed. Jeffrey thought he was doing the world a favor, and all he did was take out some lackey."

"You and I both know that Jeffrey didn't kill that man," Josh said. "He's far too organized to commit a crime that sloppy."

Not always, Olivia thought, suppressing the flinch that went through her at Josh's words. She pressed a hand against the tree for support, feeling a tremble run through her. One of these days it will stop blindsiding me, she told herself for the thousandth time. Sooner or later, I can make myself forget that he's anything but Ava's father and the good man who became my friend.

"Olivia?" There was concern in Josh's voice. "You okay?"

She nodded, unwilling to look up for fear he would see the truth she had kept from him — from virtually everyone — for so many years. That would be the last straw, she thought. Josh would go to war with Jeffrey over Reva.

Once the thought would have given her an angle to play. Now it just made her sad.

She took a steadying breath, willing herself to focus on Josh's words. She turned the pieces over in her mind, looking up at him as they clicked into place. "Jeffrey set himself up, didn't he."

Josh nodded. "He and Dinah have been searching for Edmund for the last several weeks. Every time they think they've caught up with him, he disappears."

"So you think he's headed back to Springfield?" Olivia narrowed her eyes, trying to find some logic in that behavior. Not that logic was ever Edmund's strong suit, she thought. Delusions of grandeur and fits of madness were always more his style.

"We think he's after Reva and Colin," Josh said. "That's why I've been spending so much time at Cross Creek. I promised Jeffrey I'd watch over her."

"Her white knight to the last." Olivia brushed her fingertips over Josh's beard. "You're too good for her, you know."

Josh shrugged, an old pain flickering in his eyes. "We all do what we must."

"Yes we do." Olivia saw Natalia coming back along the sidewalk. She felt a tremor of love run through her, as strong as any she'd ever experienced. "God knows, I'd do anything to protect the people I love."

"I do know that." Josh tipped his head to the side, that puzzled look on his face again. "Is there something you're not telling me?"

"Nothing that won't be clear in just a moment," Olivia said, stepping out from under the tree as Natalia returned. She caught her hand, pulling her close and planting a kiss on her lips. "Hi."

"Hi," Natalia replied, looking both startled and amused by the greeting. "Going all out for the exes, are we?"

"Uh huh." Olivia relieved Natalia of the plastic carton she was carrying and held it toward Josh, half turning as she cuddled Natalia against her. "Cookie, Mr. Lewis?"

"I...uh..." Josh's face had gone pink. "I think a cookie would be..." His eyes ran over their entwined forms. "Just wonderful."

"Natalia made them herself, just this morning." Olivia tried not to laugh when Josh fumbled at the lid of the carton, his eyes hovering at about cleavage level. "I tasted one this morning, and I'll tell you, they are absolutely delicious."

"Olivia!" Natalia hissed. She sounded scandalized, but Olivia could feel the laughter that she was trying to keep from spilling out.

"I'm sure they're..." Josh tipped his head to the side again, his eyes narrowing. "It wouldn't have mattered how many muffins I bought you, would it."

"Pretty much no," Olivia said, pulling Natalia tighter against her. "I don't think muffins are going to have much effect on me any more."

"Well, then." Josh took a bite of the cookie he'd taken. "I wish you both the best."

"Thank you," Natalia said softly, and Olivia just grinned, giving Josh one last quirk of the eyebrows for good measure.

"Olivia, I'll let you know if anything comes up with that matter we were discussing," Josh said, and she saw the worry in his eyes, and beneath it all, the affection and respect that had never faded, no matter how bad things got.

Olivia nodded, giving him a small smile of gratitude. She turned, her arm still around Natalia, and led them toward the food table.

"What's all this about muffins?" Natalia asked, her voice tinged with a hint of jealousy.

"Nothing to worry about," Olivia said, dropping a playful kiss onto Natalia's cheek. "I'm all about the cookies these days."

6.

An hour later, Natalia was sitting beside Blake, watching Emma and Olivia compete in the egg toss. "I don't think I've ever seen Olivia so happy," Blake said. "You're good for her."

"She's good for me," Natalia said, unable to hold back a grin when Olivia glanced over, her delight in Emma's happiness written all over her face. "I don't know what I would do without her."

"Are you sure that you want to keep working for me?" Blake asked. "I mean, I know you had reasons for stepping back from working with Olivia, but now that you're public..."

Natalia glanced over at Blake, unable to hide her sudden worry at the other woman's words. "Are you not happy with my work?"

"No!" Blake exclaimed, her pale green eyes widening. "No, not at all, you're wonderful. It's just that I know that Olivia can offer you more. I can't even give you insurance."

"We'll figure it out," Natalia said. "Maybe I can go back to work for Olivia part time, or..." Her voice trailed off as Emma's long throw of the egg in her hand went amiss and splattered at Marina's feet. "Oh, dear."

"Yeah, those pants are pretty well ruined." The two of them watched as Marina threw her egg down and stomped off in a huff. "I should go check the house, make sure nothing's spilled or broken or overflowing in there."

"You're awfully helpful to Rick," Natalia said, unable to keep the curiosity from her voice.

"This was Maureen's house," Blake said, as if that explained everything, and with that she was off in a flash of red shirt and white capris.

Natalia squinted into the sun as Olivia trotted over and plopped down beside her, a gleeful grin on her face. "You're a little too happy that that egg hit Marina instead of you."

"Couldn't have happened to a nicer person." Olivia pressed her hand to the small of Natalia's back. "Emma is having so much fun."

"She is." Natalia gazed toward the back of the yard, watching Emma attempt to organize a volleyball game with James and Lizzie. After a moment, she looked back at Olivia. "Who was Maureen?"

"Maureen Bauer was Rick's stepmom and Matt's aunt. She died several years before I came to town. Why?"

Natalia shrugged. "Blake said something about this being her house, like that explained her being so helpful to Rick."

Olivia shrugged. "From what I know, everyone loved Maureen. She was the saint of Springfield."

"I thought I was the saint of Springfield," Natalia said, a hint of mockery in her tone.

Olivia leaned close to her ear and whispered, "Not after tonight, beautiful."

A blast of heat shot from Natalia's belly, prickling through her entire body. She felt Olivia's thumb brush down her spine, a corresponding shiver shooting upward along her vertebrae. "Not fair," she said under her breath as she squirmed in her seat, hoping her face wasn't as red as it felt.

She glanced around, her eyes falling on the trio of Lewis men standing near the beer cooler. Bill Lewis caught her gaze and shot her a dimpled grin, as did Josh, who showed off that same ridiculous dimple. Josh then elbowed Billy and murmured something in his ear. Billy's head shot up, his gaze locking on Natalia, a glazed grin plastering itself across his face.

"This is ridiculous." Natalia turned toward Olivia, burying her face in the older woman's shoulder. "The entire Lewis clan is..."

"Dying of envy?" Olivia laughed, pressing her right hand to the back of Natalia's head. She brushed a kiss against Natalia's hair and whispered, "We're okay, you know."

Natalia nodded. "I'm just not used to being so high profile." She lifted her head to meet Olivia's bemused, loving gaze. "I was always the person who stayed safe on the sidelines."

"You okay with flying closer to the sun?" Olivia asked. "Or...being the star quarterback, or whatever the damn mixed metaphor should be?"

Natalia looked into the turbulent green seas of Olivia's eyes and replied, "I'm okay as long as you're here."

They looked at each other, and for a moment, time stopped. Natalia felt her senses narrow, her mind filtering out everything except Olivia's face: the curve of her mouth, the laugh lines around her eyes, the way a shock of reddish-brown bangs strayed across her forehead. Natalia took a breath, but it seemed so slow, the air she drew in sharp and tinged with ozone from the electricity that crackled between them. I don't know how I could have thought that we could be anything other than this, Natalia thought as the breath burned into her lungs. I love her so much it hurts.

She was wrenched back into a world in which she could see something other than Olivia Spencer by Emma, who had bounded up and grasped her arm. "Come on Natalia, it's time for the three-legged race! We're going to win!"

"We are?" Natalia asked, her eyes still fixed on Olivia's. She saw Olvia's amused grin and cleared her throat, ripping her eyes away so they were focused on Emma. "I mean, we are. You ready?"

"Ready Freddy!" Emma exclaimed.

"Well then let's go!" Natalia said, letting Emma drag her away, knowing that was the only way she would be able to tear herself away from the warmth and light that was Olivia sitting beside her.

They didn't win, of course — Phillip and James managed to do that, despite the fact that they sniped at each other the entire length of the field. Natalia consoled Emma with a hug and sent her off to join the kids' volleyball game that the little Santos boy had organized. She was about to return to Olivia when she saw Rafe, standing on the edge of the trees, pretending he didn't have a care in the world. She recognized that body language, however; her boy was scared and unsure, wanting to join in but desperately afraid he'd be rejected. She felt a momentary stab of anger for how he had behaved the night before, but it was quickly subsumed by the look he turned on her when he caught her eye. God help me, she thought. Even when he has done something so wrong, I can't look at him with anything but love.

She walked up to him slowly, giving him time to rethink his position, but to his credit, he never wavered, holding still while she crossed the remaining distance to stand before him. "Hi," she said, her voice soft and low.

"Hey," he replied, his tone remote, distant. He fidgeted with his backwards baseball cap, fingered the cross dangling from his neck over his white wifebeater, then jammed his hands into the pockets of his baggy shorts. He scuffed his feet, the expensive cross-trainers she'd bought for him as his welcome home gift showing green stains from the grass. Never could get him to keep his shoes clean, she thought, amused in spite of it all that some things never changed. I give it a month before he's complaining that these are ruined and that he wants a new pair.

"Have you eaten anything today?" she asked, noting the pallor beneath the olive tones of his skin. He rarely looked like that, except when his blood sugar was out of whack or during the months when he was in —

She didn't let her mind go there, wouldn't let her mind go there. Her son would find a way to cope with the real world. You won't lose your son, she heard, the words a blend of her own and Olivia's voices, and she held fast to those words as she lifted one hand to clasp Rafe's wrist. His skin was clammy, she noted; another sure sign that his body was not in balance.

"Mijo, you need to eat," she said. "They've got all kinds of food over there. There's chicken and burgers and —"

"Ma, I'm not hungry," Rafe said irritably. "Just leave me alone, would you?"

"No," she said, hearing an edge creeping into her tone. "Rafe, you know as well as I do that drinking messes up your blood sugar. You made a choice, and now you have to fix it. And if you don't want to end up in the emergency room, that means you go eat something and take care of your body."

"If I want to eat, I'll eat," Rafe said, his eyes cold as he stared down at her. "If I want to drink, I'll drink. You made it clear that I'm on my own, Ma, so just get off my back about everything I do."

"And if you end up having an insulin reaction, who will take care of you?" Natalia asked, straining to keep the contempt out of her voice. "Do you think Frank will? Really, Rafe? Because I don't think Frank knows how to bake a sugar-free cake or make a salad that you will actually eat or know which movies you want to watch when you're too sick to get off the couch. I'm the one who knows these things, Rafael, not Frank."

"At least he doesn't lie to me!" Rafe said, his voice raised. "At least he tells me the truth about who he is, and doesn't pretend to be something he's not!"

"What am I pretending to be?" Natalia asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She could feel the cold fury rising in her, for this boy who refused to be a man, who refused to see the consequences of his actions. "Your mother who loves you? The person who taught you that threatening people and using violence to solve your problems is wrong? I taught you that God loves everyone, no matter what the color of their skin or who they are. So I don't see how you could say I'm pretending when I'm standing here repeating words I've used a hundred times before."

"You taught me to believe in the Church and what it says. And now you just throw it away because she tells you to." Rafe gestured behind Natalia, and she was sure if she turned around she would see Olivia, hovering protectively perhaps twenty feet away, her eye on their conversation even as she pretended to chat with Buzz or Josh or Blake about the weather or if Alan making an appearance was a sign that the end of the world was about to commence.

"I'm not throwing it away," Natalia said. "Rafe, don't you see? God's love is a work in progress. It helps us to grow and change and become who we're supposed to be. And when I'm with Olivia, I know that I'm on the right path. I'm a better person with her, Rafe, and with Emma. I have a purpose that feels right and true, and most of all, I'm happy."

"Right," Rafe scoffed. "You're happier with her than you've ever been. Happier than you were with Gus. Certainly happier than you ever were with me."

"I don't mean it that way." Oh God, Natalia thought, her heart shattering at the realization. That's what this is about. All those years it was just us, and now he's jealous that I won't love him the way I did. Oh mijo, you are such a little fool.

She reached a hand out, touching it lightly against his forearm, afraid if she actually wrapped her fingers around his arm that he would pull away. "Nothing could ever take your place in my heart. Emma and Olivia, they are part of me just as you are. But I don't have to move one to have the other."

"They're not us," Rafe said. "Gus was part of us. Frank was — Frank just wanted to make you happy. I love Emma, she's a great little kid, but she's not your kid, Ma. She doesn't belong to you the way I do. And when Olivia ditches you like she ditches everyone, you're gonna lose Emma, and it's gonna kill you. I don't want to see that happen. I don't want you to go to hell for someone who isn't even going to be there for you like I will."

Oh, Rafe, Natalia thought, stunned by the convoluted logic of his statements. She wanted to deck whomever had fed Rafe such a distorted version of Olivia's past — and she could bet money she knew who that had been — but more than that, she wanted to hold Rafe, crush him close to her like she had when he was a little boy and his fear of the dark and the sirens and shouting from the street combined to terrorize him from sleep. She would hear him crying, and somehow she would drag herself off her thin mattress and into his room, wrapping him up in her arms and carrying him back to her bed where they would huddle together and she would sing to him: Yo Soy Vicentillo and Arroz con Leche, the songs of her childhood, until he fell asleep with his head propped against her chest, his little hand clasped in hers. It was just a dream, she would tell him in the morning. Those things that scared you, they went away with the sunshine. Only now they didn't seem to go away for her sweet boy — they clung to him, making him hard and sullen and so very afraid of everything around him. Including me, she thought. Me as I am now, but especially me with Olivia.

"I love you, Rafe," Natalia said softly, daring to add the gentlest hint of pressure to his forearm. "I love you, and I would do anything to make this easier for you. I will give you all the time that you need. But if you think that your anger is going to make me turn away from Olivia, you're wrong. And if you threaten her again —" Her voice choked with emotion, even as she realized what her next words had to be. "If you do anything that would bring harm to her or Emma, I will have you sent back to jail. I mean that, Rafe. You will never behave like you did last night toward her again."

Rafe looked her straight in the eye, and Natalia saw a small, frightened boy gazing back at her. Then the hardness returned, the cold, angry mien she had seen radiating from those depths the night before. "I guess I know who you're loyal to," he said, his upper lip curling in distaste. He backed up a few steps, then turned swiftly, his open tan overshirt flapping in the breeze as he broke into a jog, heading toward the front of the house.

For a few moments, Natalia could only watch him walk away. My little boy, she thought, and then corrected herself with a rueful sigh. My son, the man. If only he knew how to act like one.

She felt a gentle hand brush her shoulder. "Natalia?"

She shook her head, unable to turn and meet Olivia's eyes. She felt Olivia's arm curl around her neck, felt Olivia's breath warm against her skin. Olivia pressed a light kiss just below Natalia's ear before burying her face in Natalia's hair. "You did the best you could. You got him to talk to you for a while."

"Did we put on a show for the whole town?" Natalia asked, lifting one hand to thread her fingers through Olivia's.

"Everyone was distracted by Billy and James giving Alan a primer on squirt guns," Olivia said. "His bespoke suit is shrinking as we speak."

"His what suit?"

"Never mind." Olivia wrapped her free arm tightly around Natalia's waist, pressing into her back. "I take it Rafe hasn't had a drastic change of heart overnight."

"No." Natalia eased her weight back into Olivia, drawing strength from those encircling arms. "I'm sorry Rafe's anger is interfering with our special day."

"Hey." Olivia twisted around so that she could look into Natalia's eyes. "Good and bad, we're in this together, right?"

Natalia smiled, relief flooding through her at the words. "I guess it's inevitable that we would have that argument. It just figures it would happen at the biggest gathering in town."

"Welcome to Springfield," Olivia said, giving a wry smile. She tugged Natalia's hand. "Come on. People are lining up to eat. We'd better get over there before they're out and we have to wait for Blake to go shopping again."

"Poor Blake," Natalia said with a soft laugh. She wiped at her face, then pivoted, her arm reaching out automatically to hook around Olivia's waist. As she turned, she saw Frank coming toward them. He was wearing jeans and a dark blue patterned shirt, his face set in that 'pity me' gaze that he'd been wearing ever since their aborted nuptials. "Oh, not now."

"I got it." Olivia gave Natalia a protective squeeze before turning her head in Frank's direction. "Hey, Frankie, what's up?"

"I wanted to talk to Natalia about Rafe," Frank said, his wounded brown eyes locked on Natalia's. "He's really having a hard time."

"He's making bad choices, Frank," Natalia said. "I know he's hurting, but he's grown now. He has to take some responsibility for what he's doing."

"But he's such a good kid. I think if you would just give him the time he needs, maybe take a step back from being so —" Frank waved his hand at them, his face twisting in distaste. "So obvious. Maybe he'd be able to adjust to this lifestyle you've decided to adopt."

Natalia stiffened, her temper close to boiling, and felt Olivia tense as well. Still, Olivia's hand on her back was soothing as she said in a calm voice, "Frankie, you know, this just isn't the time. Let's enjoy the picnic. Tomorrow, maybe we can get together and talk everything over."

"Nobody asked you, Olivia," Frank snapped, his voice filled with contempt. "Why don't you just mind your own business?"

"Because it is her business, Frank," Natalia said, stepping forward so that she was toe to toe with the detective. "Olivia is the person I share my life with. She has as much right as you do to be involved in decisions related to how we handle things with Rafe. More, in fact, because based on the decisions you've been making lately, I don't know that it's good for him to be spending time with you."

Frank's face blanked in confusion. "How can you say that, Natalia? I've given the kid a home, a place where he can be safe and sort out his problems."

"And beer, apparently." Natalia narrowed the distance between them, lowering her voice. "He's underage and he's got diabetes, Frank. Those are just two of the reasons why it's a really bad idea for him to be drinking. But when he showed up at the farmhouse yesterday, it was obvious he had been, a lot. And you know what beer he had in his hand? I'll tell you. The same kind that disappears from Company and ends up in your refrigerator. We all knew it, we all looked the other way because it was a family business and who cared, really, but when it ends up in my son's hands, and he's drunk enough to think that a beer bottle would make a convenient weapon —"

"Weapon?" Frank rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on, Natalia. It was a simple misunderstanding."

Natalia clenched her fists, fighting the urge to grab Frank and shake him until he woke up. "He smashed a beer bottle, Frank, and he was threatening Olivia with the jagged end of it. If that happened outside of Farley's you'd be booking him for attempted assault with a deadly weapon. So don't tell me he didn't mean it or it was a misunderstanding."

Frank took a step back, his eyes troubled. He turned his gaze on Olivia. "Rafe says you provoked him."

"Rafe was angry from the moment he arrived." Olivia stepped forward, her hand falling to the small of Natalia's back once again, and Natalia felt something in her settle at the contact. "Did I lose my temper? Yeah, I did. You can only be aggressive with me for so long before I snap back, Frankie. You know that." She arched one eyebrow at him, as if to say, And your time is running short.

"Maybe that's the problem. You snapped back at him." Frank looked back at Natalia, his gaze accusing. "This is what you want? Really?"

"What I want," Natalia said, sighing. She stared down at the ground, her mind whirling. She was so tired of this — tired of the blame and recriminations that radiated off the man. His self-pity, she now realized, was toxic, infecting everything around him. It had to stop. "Frank, I want you to do what you agreed to do. Be a mentor to my son. Make sure he's going to work and eating right and not staying out all night and not drinking. If he wants to live with you and you think that's okay, then I'm fine with that too. What I'm not fine with? You polluting his mind with lies and self-pity. I know you think that I chose Olivia over you, but the fact is, Frank, that Olivia and I were a couple long before you ever came into the picture. I was scared and confused and I ran away from it —" She glanced over at Olivia, and Natalia couldn't even put words to what she saw in Olivia's gaze, she only knew it made her feel strong and alive and ready to say what she'd needed to say for a long time. "We both ran away from it, I think, because we were frightened. You got hurt because of that, and it wasn't fair."

"I loved you." Frank practically spat the words at her, yet Natalia could hear the hurt underneath.

"I know." Natalia felt Olivia's arm tighten around her waist. "I know that, and I wish it wasn't so hard on you. But I can't apologize for this any more, Frank, and I can't live my life feeling guilty about the fact that you're unhappy with how things went. I did something wrong to you, and I have asked your forgiveness. If you can't give it to me, then I will have to live with that. But Olivia and I are moving on with our lives."

"There's no chance?" Frank asked, his voice soft, almost childish, and Natalia caught a glimpse of what he must have been like at twelve; the fatherless boy, desperately trying to be a man. Like Rafe, she thought in a moment of sudden clarity. So afraid to be alone.

"I'm sorry, Frank, but there never was." Natalia reached out a hand to him. "I wish you nothing but happiness. But I can't be the one who gives it to you."

Frank nodded, his body sagging as some essential support structure crumbled under the force of her words. He didn't meet her eyes again as he turned, his head bowed, and walked off toward the side of the house.

"I know that was hard," Olivia said when Frank was gone.

Natalia shook her head. She turned to face Olivia, her hands resting on Olivia's elbows. "Everybody's so busy trying to impose their idea of who I should be on me that they don't actually know who I am. You're the only person I know who sees me, Olivia. Why is that?"

"People like to decide who a person is and stick with that label." The knowing sadness in Olivia's tone made it clear that she'd had more than her fair share of experience with people who hadn't taken the time to see her as anything more than the sum of their expectations. "It's predictable, which makes it easier to control."

"Well I don't want to be predictable any more," Natalia said. "I just want to live my life and be happy with you."

"I want that too." Olivia pulled Natalia close and planted a peck on her lips. "You know what else I really want?"

"What?" Natalia asked.

"A hamburger and a beer. And some potato salad. And deviled eggs. Do you like deviled eggs?"

"Oh my God," Natalia said, chuckling. "What happened to the woman who pitched a fit the first time I tried to feed her tuna noodle casserole?"

"She fell in love." Olivia pulled her close, swaying them slowly as they embraced. "I know the last fifteen minutes haven't been much fun. But I love you, and I am so proud of the way you stood up for yourself and for us to both Rafe and Frank. I can't tell you how much it means to me that you're not afraid any more."

"Oh, I'm still afraid," Natalia admitted, and she saw a glimmer of fear in Olivia's eyes in the words. She brushed her hand across Olivia's cheek, giving her a reassuring smile as she continued. "I'm afraid that Frank will keep feeding Rafe's jealousy, or that Rafe will do something stupid and get himself sent back to jail. I'm afraid that people will say horrible things to Emma about us, and that it will hurt her. I'm even afraid that they'll run out of her Rice Krispie treats before we get to try them."

Olivia grinned. "Well, considering the giant chunks you cut them in..."

"Yeah, yeah." Natalia tucked a lock of hair behind Olivia's ear, letting her hand fall to rest against Olivia's neck. "I'm afraid of so many things in this world, but the one thing I refuse to be afraid of is my love for you. And wherever that takes us is where we're supposed to be."

"This newfound confidence is incredibly sexy, you know," Olivia purred.

"Good." Natalia hooked two fingers through the side belt loop of Olivia's jeans, using it to leverage her closer. "About time I got to drive you crazy for a while."

"Oh, you spend plenty of time driving me crazy, trust me," Olivia murmured, her head dropping lower. Natalia pressed up on tiptoe, her body moving to meet Olivia halfway. Their lips were just on the verge of touching —

"Mommy! Natalia!" Emma squealed, slamming into both of them with force and encircling their bodies in a hug. "I beat James at Frisbee!"

"You did?" Olivia said, her voice strangled. She widened her eyes at Natalia, murmuring, "Kid gets her timing from Phillip, I swear."

Natalia laughed, turning so that she could look down at Emma. "That's pretty impressive, Emma."

"I know!" Emma tugged at both their waists, looking at them beseechingly. "I'm really hungry. Can we eat now?"

"That's just what we were going to do, Jellybean." Olivia turned back to Natalia and jerked her head toward the food table. "See? You can't escape the pull of the deviled eggs."

"You are so weird," Natalia replied, disentangling herself from her family's embrace.

"Good thing you love me," Olivia said, snagging Emma's hand.

Natalia took Emma's other hand. She cast a glance at Olivia and grinned. "It really, really is."

7.

The process, Olivia thought as she polished off her second hamburger, was such a fascinating one. People had been used to seeing her joined at the hip with Natalia for so long now that it was taking them a while to connect the dots and notice what, it turned out, had been in front of their eyes all along. Christina and Mel noticed first — they'd been late to arrive at the barbeque, but both of them had had an inkling for a while, and so it didn't take long for their eyes to light in recognition. Remy had taken a bit longer, but then Remy took a bit longer with most things, so it wasn't a surprise when Olivia caught Christina smacking him on the shoulder and whispering in his ear. The most amusing part, she supposed, was how he'd grinned like a sailor about to embark on shore leave when the realization finally hit him. But then, she'd expected most men to react that way. She was Olivia Spencer, and she knew how men reacted to her, and Natalia — well, Natalia was the most beautiful woman on the planet, hands down, so of course the idea of the two of them as a couple would make every man in the place a little nuts. Hell, even Alan had looked a little turned on in the midst of his glowering.

The women? Well, that was a different response entirely. Beth had seemed quietly amused and perhaps even supportive, which didn't surprise Olivia. She might have her Stepford moments, but in general, Beth was a decent human being, inclined toward forgiveness. Her evil wench of a daughter was something else, but then, Olivia mused, perhaps some of the evil had worn off in the last few years.

In the distance, she heard Lizzie's shrill whine. "Bi-iiiii-iiiiiillllllll! Dooonnnnnnnnn'tttttttt!"

Nope. Still evil.

Blake was their champion, sitting with them while they ate and making it clear by her presence that she was in favor of the match. It was, Olivia mused, the same sort of thing that Holly might have done, only Holly would have been far cattier about those whose glances were furtive and judgmental. Like Olivia, Holly had always been enough of an outsider that she could keep a running commentary going on her own ostracization while it was happening. Olivia had never been able to shake the feeling that with Blake's mother, there were always knives quietly being sharpened in some corner of her mind, tucked away waiting for their chance to be used. It was probably the main reason why the two of them had gotten along so well.

As for the rest of the guests: Olivia did a quick assessment. The Lewises were clearly in favor, though she said a quick thanks to that God Natalia loved so much that Reva had decided to absent herself this year. Michelle and Danny Santos were too busy keeping the kids — Emma included — from falling into the pool to do much else, and besides, they weren't in town any more and so their reaction didn't really matter. Mallet and Marina had been glowering at them since Frank left, but there was little they could do about that, and besides, Marina had a chip on her shoulder a mile wide when it came to both Olivia and Natalia. If there was one thing Olivia had learned in recent years, it was that she didn't give a flying fuck about Marina's opinion on any subject.

So that left...she glanced around. Pretty much everyone gets it, she thought, noting the surreptitious glance Mindy Lewis threw her way as she crossed the yard, a pitcher of lemonade in her hand. The word was out, the die was cast, look out Springfield, there is girl on girl action in your midst.

Only two people didn't seem to be in on the joke.

"I have, I've hiked before," Natalia was saying, nodding her head at Matt, her eyes straying to where Olivia was sitting. She had made the mistake of going over to the drinks table to grab them each another beer and had gotten waylaid by the lonely bicyclist. "Last spring, Olivia and I went to this resort a few hours from here and we did some hiking."

"Oh, really," Matt said, nodding his head in return as if this was the most fascinating thing he had ever heard. "What level trails were you hiking? Because we could find some around here that would match that."

A hand fell on Olivia's shoulder, and she heard Josh croon, "I think my buddy is putting the moves on your girl."

She turned to see ex-husband number one leaning over her shoulder. Shayne was beside him, staring over at Matt and Natalia and grinning from ear to ear.

"Another Lewis man enthralled by the smell of lesbian in the air?" Olivia asked, rising. She circled around so that she could stand between Josh and Shayne, leaning over to give her former stepson a hug. "Good to see you."

"You know that whole hot stepmom fantasy thing?" Shayne asked. "Multiply that by a thousand."

"Yeah yeah." She mock cuffed him on the chin. "Hey, Josh told me about Dinah. Have you heard anything?"

"No." Olivia could see the worry in Shayne's eyes. "I feel better knowing she's with Jeffrey, but still."

Olivia patted his back in what she hoped was a reassuring fashion. "Jeffrey will make sure she's okay. He won't let her put her life at risk." With a wry grin, she added, "Besides, it's Dinah. That girl has nine lives."

"I hope you're right." Shayne turned his gaze back to the drinks table. "Uh oh."

Olivia looked up and almost burst out laughing when she saw that Rick had sidled up to Natalia, leaving her effectively pinned between the town's least eligible bachelors. "Have you tried my hot dogs?" he asked Natalia. "Because I swear, they're the best dogs in town."

"I'm more of a..." Natalia shot a help me look at Olivia. "More of a hamburger person, actually."

"Oh but come on, you can't turn down a good dog." Rick reached around behind him, picking up a plate with a hot dog and bun on it. He snagged the mustard and started squeezing it on. "You just have to get the right flavoring, and then..."

"You better get over there," Josh said.

"Why?" Olivia grinned. "She's holding her own."

"It is kind of fun to watch," Shayne said. "They just don't get it, do they."

Olivia laughed. "Not a clue."

"And then after you get the dog all doctored up, you have to eat it right away," Rick said, the picture of seriousness. "You can't let it get cold because then it just won't taste the same."

"Hey, Rick," Matt said, his voice raising in exasperation. "You know, I was talking to Natalia." He put his hand on her sleeve, and Natalia tore her horrified fascination away from the way Rick was slathering mustard on the hot dog. Her right hand, Olivia noticed, had slid down to her jeans pocket, her middle finger extended further than the rest in what was clearly intended to be a swear jar offense.

"Oh that's not good," Josh said.

"Yeah, you're in the deep freeze tonight, Olivia," Shayne said.

"Better get used to that bed being cold for at least, what, a week?"

"Two," Shayne said. "If you're getting the finger, it's two at least."

"The next thing you know she'll be hiding out at a friend's house, getting facials and eating ice cream and refusing to take your phone calls and —"

"Oh just stop," Olivia said, slugging Josh's arm. She turned, searching behind her, and called out, "Phillip."

He lifted his head, jogging over when she beckoned. "What's up?"

"Time for that present I promised you," she said, gesturing toward the food table. She couldn't help but laugh at the delighted grin that lit up his features.

"I owe you big," he said.

"Pay me back by keeping an eye on Emma for twenty minutes or so?"

This time all three of them were grinning as Phillip said, "Will do."

"Thanks." Olivia stretched, shook out her shoulders, and jammed her hands into her pockets. "Watch and learn, boys. Watch and learn."

"Sure you don't want a bite?" Rick was saying, waving the now half-eaten hot dog in front of Natalia's face as Olivia sauntered over. "See you just have to give it a taste, and then you'll know that this is the best..." He glanced up. "Oh hi, Olivia."

"Hi Rick. Matt." She gave them each her most seductive look, then turned her gaze on Natalia, whose face had It's about time and what the hell were you waiting for plastered all over it. "Hey."

"Olivia, tell Natalia how good my hot dogs are." Rick took a bite, continuing to talk while he chewed. "You've had them, haven't you?"

"I'm more of a hamburger girl myself," Olivia said, grinning when she saw Natalia's lips twitch at the statement.

"Funny, that's what she said," Matt pointed out.

"I know, right? Next thing you know we'll be on the couch fighting over the remote in matching jogging suits like an old married couple." Olivia took another step forward, her hands lifting out of her pockets to rest on Natalia's waist. She caught the laughter dancing in Natalia's eyes, met it with a sly smile of her own, and then they were kissing — gently, thoroughly kissing, oblivious to anyone but each other.

"Hey, baby," she said as she pulled back. "I thought you were getting us a couple of beers?"

"I got a little waylaid," Natalia said, laughter bubbling in her voice.

"I see that." Olivia took a step back, pulling Natalia with her so that the two of them were standing, joined at the hip, facing Matt and Rick. Rick, Olivia noticed, was frozen, the hot dog half in his mouth, unchewed. She couldn't resist saying, "You have a little mustard," her tongue flicking to the corner of her mouth to demonstrate where the condiment remnant was lodged.

Matt looked at Olivia, then at Natalia, then at Olivia again. He cleared his throat and said, "So I suppose you ladies would like those beers now." He reached into the cooler, fishing two out.

"I think maybe we'll —" Olivia looked at Natalia. "Want to wait, maybe get those later?"

"We could." The fully-dimpled onslaught of Natalia's smile made Olivia's whole body tingle. "You had something else in mind?"

"Yeah, maybe." Olivia nodded at Matt, then turned her attention to Rick. "Rick?"

"Huh," he grunted from around the hot dog.

"Don't choke, okay?" Taking Natalia's hand, she started walking toward the woods on the edge of the property.

"Hey, Olivia," she heard Josh call out.

She twisted at the waist, half-turning to look at him.

"You know, if you want, I could hit on Natalia sometime, just so —"

She grinned and flipped him off, amused by the testoserone-fueled laughter that followed the gesture.

Natalia said, "So you're one of the boys now?"

"I get the feeling maybe I always was," Olivia replied as they drew under the cover of the trees. "I have to say, that was really fun."

"Well except for the part where you left me stuck there for five minutes." Natalia jerked Olivia around, pressing her backwards into the nearest elm. Her brown eyes flashed as she asked, "Were you enjoying yourself?"

"Whoa, tiger," Olivia gasped, overwhelmed by the lust that suddenly ran through her body at the feel of being pinned between Natalia and the tree. She took a moment to steady herself, then said, "I was just making sure the clueless twins would be left with no doubts as to who you were with. That's all."

"And if you got to put on a little show in the process..."

"Well." Olivia leaned forward so that her mouth was almost touching Natalia's. She looked into her eyes and whispered, "You do know how I love the grand gesture."

Olivia wasn't sure which of them moved first, and within a second it didn't matter, all that mattered was the feel of Natalia against her, the sweet, aching need of Natalia's mouth against hers. She wound her arms around Natalia's shoulders, the bark rough against her back as Natalia pressed her hard against the tree.

When the need for oxygen became so strong that Olivia couldn't bear it anymore, she ripped her mouth away, drawing in a gasp of air, her cheek pressed against Natalia's. "I love you so much," she murmured. "I can't stand it sometimes, how much I love you."

"Me too." Natalia gazed up at Olivia, her eyes hazy with desire. "If it wouldn't upset Emma so much, I would wish for it to start pouring rain. I just want to be home with you."

"Really." Olivia pressed a series of soft kisses against Natalia's temple. "You know, Josh and Shayne figured I wouldn't be getting any loving for at least two weeks over leaving you to fend for yourself with Rick and Matt."

"Two weeks, huh?" Natalia turned her face into Olivia's kisses. "That seems extreme."

"Josh said one. Shayne said two." Olivia brought a hand up to cup the back of Natalia's head, her other arm pressing her closer. "Personally, I'm hoping you'll be forgiving. Let me back into your good graces sooner than that."

"Well, my religion does preach mercy." Natalia's hands drifted to Olivia's waist, her hands tugging Olivia's gray t-shirt free of her black jeans. She slid her hands underneath the cloth, her fingertips drifting over Olivia's ribs, thumbs stroking Olivia's abdomen. "My God, you feel so amazing."

"Natalia," Olivia whispered, hearing the need in her voice. Her whole body was shaking, desperate for contact. "Please."

"I think your bed's going to be plenty warm tonight." Natalia ran her lips over Olivia's neck. "My bed I mean." She found Olivia's mouth, whispering against it, "Our bed."

Olivia felt the breath whoosh out of her lungs. With an effort, she got it back long enough to gasp, "Who are you and what have you done with Natalia Rivera?"

Natalia smiled against her mouth. "I'm still me. I'm just sure now."

"Sure?" Olivia felt Natalia curl her fingers, the backs of her fingernails trailing over Olivia's ribs. "Jesus Christ, baby."

"Careful," Natalia whispered, nibbling on Olivia's lower lip. "There are limits to how tolerant I can be."

"You'll survive," Olivia growled, lifting one knee and sliding it upward between Natalia's legs. She planted her foot against the tree, then pulled Natalia against her, using her leverage to hold the shorter woman tight against her thigh. Natalia let out a whimper and rested her forehead against Olivia's cheek, her breath coming in soft gasps.

"You okay?" Olivia asked, cradling the back of Natalia's head while her mouth caressed the side of Natalia's face. She could feel Natalia fighting the instinct to move against her, her body motionless except for the trembling just beneath the surface of her skin. Her thumbs moved against Olivia's abdomen in a slow, sweeping arc that, Olivia suspected, was timed to the way her hips would be moving if she weren't resisting the impulse.

"You're making me crazy," Natalia rasped.

"Now you know how I feel." Olivia slid one hand down to the small of Natalia's back. "Do you want more?"

"I..." Natalia drew in an unsteady breath. "I want the fireworks to be over so we can go home."

"We could sneak out early."

"Emma would be so disappointed." Natalia pulled her hands out from beneath Olivia's shirt, lifting them up to cup Olivia's face. "I don't want to upset her."

"Me either." Olivia stroked her fingers through Natalia's thick, dark hair, each strand like a silken caress against her skin. "Our baby will never forgive us if we make her leave early so we can make out."

"Make out?" Natalia chuckled. "Is that what you call this?"

"By comparison to what I'm going to do to you tonight?" Olivia slid one hand beneath the back of Natalia's blouse, her fingertips tracing the smooth skin just above the waistline of Natalia's jeans. "This is just a little peck on the cheek."

"Madre de Dios," Natalia breathed, pinning Olivia's shoulders to the tree as she caught Olivia's mouth in a hard kiss. Something had been loosed between them — something wild, and primal, and unlike anything Olivia had ever experienced. It wasn't the passion — she'd felt that before, with Josh, with Phillip, with too many faceless, nameless guys whom she'd fucked and forgotten. This was something deeper and far more dangerous.

Love, her mind supplied. This is what it feels like when it's built on love.

Her mind reeled at the idea, that all this time, she'd never really understood what she had been feeling. What she had called love had been need and desire, want and envy. Sometimes it had been manipulation, or the product of a bored, restless mind in need of a new fix. Sometimes it had been pain, begging to be healed. Whatever feelings she had once called love, they had never been like this.

This was all those things and none of them, something entirely new, the sum of her whole self seeking connection, achieving a completion it could only find in Natalia. It was home and it was safe and it was wild and it was terrifying and it was overwhelming, so powerful that she feared she wouldn't be able to stop it. Our first time shouldn't be like this, some part of her cried out, and she knew that she had to yield to that cautionary voice. But it was hard, especially with the way Natalia was pressing into her, her tongue stroking as she gave and she took, fierce and gentle and needy and giving and strong, so much stronger than Olivia had ever imagined.

Olivia felt Natalia's mouth rip away from hers, and then she was dragging her lips down Olivia's neck, kissing and nipping along the thick cord of muscle that ran from Olivia's ear to her collarbone. Olivia let her head fall back against the bark, her eyes opening to half-mast as she stared through the dappled green canvas of the trees surrounding her. In the distance, she could hear the picnic, a cacaphony of kids playing and adults talking. She rolled her head to the side, giving Natalia better access, her knees going weak when she felt Natalia suck against her pulsepoint. Her eyes strayed toward something moving behind a tree perhaps fifty feet away. She saw brown hair, and blond, and then a man's hand, slipping up inside a shirt, making a familiar move toward second base. She blinked, wondering briefly if she was hallucinating, but when she reopened her eyes, the figures were still there, and a pair of pale blue eyes were raising to meet hers, widening in surprise.

She stared at Buzz for a moment, and Buzz stared at her. She couldn't help the grin that creased her features, almost laughed at the one that lit his face in return. He rolled his eyes and cocked his shoulders as if to say Guess it worked out for the best for both of us, and then Lillian's hand planted on his cheek and he was dragged back down into a kiss.

"Natalia," Olivia whispered, stroking the back of Natalia's head. She shifted around the tree, angling Natalia so that there was no possible way the younger woman could see Buzz and Lillian's escapades a few trunks over. "Sweetheart, we have to stop."

"Why?" Natalia mumbled. Her hands had found their way back beneath Olivia's shirt, and she slid them high along Olivia's ribs. The backs of her knuckles brushed against Olivia's bra, tracing the curved underside.

"Oh —" Motherfucker, but this is hard. Olivia choked in a breath, one hand sliding down to caress Natalia's cheek. "Because spiders and wood ticks and Emma playing 100 feet away is not — it shouldn't — we shouldn't let it happen like this. Not our first time."

Natalia breathed against Olivia's chest, the crown of her head tucked under Olivia's chin. Her hands clenched under Olivia's shirt, then slowly began to withdraw. "You're right. You just feel so good — I —"

"I know." Olivia slid a fingertip down to Natalia's chin, tilting it upward until Natalia was looking at her. Natalia's eyes were enormous, the pupils dilated in the dim green light, her cheeks flushed, lips pouty from kissing. Olivia had a flash of what it would be like to push Natalia to the ground, to peel those clothes off and kiss every inch of her, to look into her eyes when she was touched for the first time, that perfect body arching underneath hers....

But that should happen in our bed, she thought. In our home, in a place where she can be safe and protected. Where there's no rush and no need for bug spray.

"I want you so much right now," she whispered, her voice ragged. "More than I've ever wanted anyone. But we should go back to the picnic and spend the day with Emma like we planned. We've got all the time in the world."

"I know," Natalia said. "I do know that, it's just...this thing between us." She shrugged, her swollen lower lip caught between her perfect teeth.

"God, it's fierce." Olivia let out a soft laugh when Natalia gave her a solemn nod. "I thought it would be strong, but I never imagined it would be this overwhelming."

"It's like something broke inside me, and everything I've been keeping locked away just came pouring out." Natalia wrapped her arms around Olivia, hugging her tightly. "I've never had it be like this before."

"Me either," Olivia murmured, kissing the gentle curve of Natalia's forehead. She pulled back, holding Natalia at arm's length so she could finger comb Natalia's hair into some semblance of order. She checked Natalia's face and neck for stray lipstick marks, forcing herself to endure Natalia's touch against her oversensitized skin while Natalia did the same for her.

"You're maybe gonna — I think — have a —" Natalia turned guilty eyes on her, her fingertips grazing over the patch of skin where Olivia's shirt crossed her collarbone. "I tried to keep it underneath, but it looks like it kind of spread."

"Did you give me a hickey? Really?" Olivia tried to angle around to see the offending mark. "That's really unfair."

"I'm sorry," Natalia said with a soft laugh. "I really didn't think it would...you're so white."

"Thanks, I think." Olivia looked down at her, a slow grin spreading across her face. "I'll just have to make sure you get one of your own tonight."

"Olivia, you —" Natalia lifted a hand to her throat in a protective gesture. "What if Emma sees?"

Olivia pulled Natalia's hand away, her fingers sliding to the cross that always dangled from Natalia's neck. She straightened its chain, her fingers lingering as she pressed the slender length of metal into place just above Natalia's breasts. "Don't worry, beautiful. I'll make sure yours is in a place that only I get to look."

She grinned at Natalia's sharply indrawn breath, that same smile still plastered on her face when they emerged from the trees, hands clasped together, and reentered the picnic.

"Hi!" Blake said when they drew near the table where she and Beth were sitting. "Where have you two been?"

"Oh, you know," Olivia said. "Just taking a walk. Little nature walk."

"Nature's. It's. The trees are very..." Natalia stuttered to a halt.

"Naturey," Olivia supplied, her eyes darting between Beth and Blake. Neither of them, she noted, were buying it. Blake looked too smug for words, and Beth — well, Beth had the oddest look on her face, something that hovered between admiration and fascination. Her eyes narrowed, her head moving forward, and then she said, "Olivia, I think you have a leaf stuck in your hair."

Natalia whirled, her eyes widening, fingers reaching up to snatch the offending bit of green from Olivia's hair. "She bumped into a branch when we were — um —"

Olivia looked at her and burst out laughing. "You are so bad at this."

"I know, I am." Natalia dropped her eyes, embarrassed. "I really really am."

"I think it's lovely," Beth said. "Two people who are crazy about each other sneaking away for a few moments. No matter how old you are, that never stops being romantic."

Olivia briefly wondered if Beth would feel the same if she knew that her mother and Buzz were well on their way to rounding third if Buzz stuck to his usual timetable, but she managed to keep that thought to herself. Instead, she wrapped an arm around Natalia's shoulders, pulling her close. "We like romantic, right?" She pressed a kiss to Natalia's temple. "Romantic works for us."

"Blakey!" Rick bellowed from his station behind the grill. "Blakey, I need you!"

Blake grimaced. "Oh for God's sakes, why couldn't Ed have come home to run this thing this year?" She looked over at Beth and said, "I can't believe you married him."

"I can't believe I married most of them," Beth replied as Blake got to her feet and started across the yard.

Olivia gave a rueful chuckle. "Ain't that the truth."

Beth gave a sardonic smile. "It is." Her eyes ran over the two of them. "You seem so happy, though. How long have you actually been together?"

Olivia looked down at Natalia, their eyes meeting in one of those strange moments of silent communion. Olivia's mind raced through a torrent of possible answers — since their date at Towers following the wedding that never happened, or the moment in the Gazebo when Natalia told her she loved her. Maybe it was when she kissed Natalia while trying to shock her into seeing how people viewed them in light of Emma's presentation, or their Christmas together, when Natalia gave her a key and asked her to stay. None of those answers were right, and none of them were wrong.

She was still trying to think of what to say when Natalia answered, "We've been a family since last fall. But I think, in some ways, maybe we were meant to be together from the moment we set eyes on each other."

Olivia looked down at Natalia, feeling her eyes brimming at the steady, unwavering love in Natalia's gaze. "Yeah," she said softly. "I think maybe."

"That's —" Beth's eyes widened, her mouth dropping into a shocked 'O.' She stood, the white plastic chair behind her tipping over from the force of her lunge to her feet. "Oh, my God," she murmured, her face white with horror. "Oh, my God, I thought he was dead."

Olivia whirled, turning just in time to see Edmund Winslow, garbed in an impeccable light gray summer suit, saunter into the Bauer backyard. "Hello, citizens of Springfield," he called out, using the deliberately cheery voice in which he couched all of his most loathsome statements. "Has anyone missed me?"

There was a pistol in his hand.

To be continued...